A Major Dilemma

jkinetic · #1 08-12-2003, 04:26 AM

I live in LA and recently an LV poker friend of mine has moved into town and it has created such a strain on me.

He is a rich trust fund baby and has never been clinically diagnosed as a compulsive gambler, there is no doubt in my mind that he is.

Money is of no importance to him.

He can drop 20 dimes and all his bankroll in one night playing high stakes poker and just take out money from one out of many CD accounts he has.

This is how I know he is compulsive, I have seen him drop 10+ dimes playing 60/120 at the Bellagio one night and then ask to borrow a few hundred to play some 4/8!!!

I have leant him money numerous times and he has paid me back everytime, but it is becoming a tiring act.

He will blow 5 dimes at the 40/80 game and then ask to borrow another dime from me while I am at my 20/40 game, putting a strain on me for that session.

And while I am playing I can't concentrate as much because I am keeping my eyes on him to see how he is doing.

And for those superstitious players, whenever I go to a poker room with him, I never win, unless I am playing in a game with him, he is always a spot in a game.

He has a good heart and deep down inside is a good person, but I feel like a baby sitter when I am with him and most importantly he is affecting my poker earn and creating so much stress for me.

I would appreciate any input on this or personal stories that are similar to this, thanks.

Wake up CALL · #2 08-12-2003, 12:23 PM

Ask him if you can borrow 20 grand then pay it back to him as he needs it. As far as him being a compulsive gambler this is only a problem when you are losing your grocery money not when your bankroll is nearly unlimited.

Kurn, son of Mogh · #3 08-12-2003, 01:05 PM

If he truly is having a negative impact on your poker earnings, you have to cut him loose from the poker part of your life.

Yardbird · #4 08-12-2003, 02:30 PM

Good plan (borrowing the money he'll ask you for ahead of time)! Just be careful that you don't get carried away when you see your ATM reciepts! Make it a separate account that you only withdraw from when your buddy borrows from you, and keep playing with your personal stake only.

The other alternative is to be up front with him, but that will likely require some considerable tact.

You could also just not tell him when you're planning to visit the cardrooms...

pudley4 · #5 08-12-2003, 03:49 PM

[ QUOTE ]
He will blow 5 dimes at the 40/80 game and then ask to borrow another dime from me while I am at my 20/40 game, putting a strain on me for that session.

[/ QUOTE ]

Why not just bring an extra dime along? It's only 25 BB. If you have any kind of bankroll at all you should be able loan him at least a couple thou, since you know he's good for it.

One more thing - when you're playing, don't worry about how he's doing. He sounds like he can easily afford the money he's losing, so it really shouldn't be a concern. If you're worried about him hitting you up for money, just plan ahead. Either tell him beforehand that you won't loan him money, or bring extra money.

Mike · #6 08-12-2003, 04:55 PM

Not to be rude here, but who appointed you his baby sitter? I think that is the main focus, not his spending nor his borrowing. He's a grown man, and I am guessing capable of getting to and from a card room by himself? You can't control his spending, be it on gambling or anything else he spends his $$ on. Why are you burning up your energy baby sitting a grown man? What's your payoff in this?

If the $$ lending is really bothering you, you need to make it clear that in the future you are only bringing enough $$ for your own session. Have him give you $$ of his to hold before you venture out in case he needs it, that way it's no burden on you. Make it clear you won't be in the lending business any more. Perhaps even suggest you go seperate ways when you play?

This is a pretty personal issue, and I have been rather blunt in a reply, no offense intended.

SittingBull · #7 08-12-2003, 06:36 PM

[img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Wake up CALL · #8 08-12-2003, 11:06 PM

:Hello,jk! I HAVE A NO LENDING POLICY WITH MY FRIENDS!:

Both of them???? [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

lil' · #9 08-12-2003, 11:09 PM

As a friend, have you ever talked to him about any of this? It sounds like you haven't. It might ease your mind to know you at least tried and didn't stand idly by.

As a poker player, you can't be worried about him while you're playing.

oddjob · #10 08-13-2003, 01:30 PM

[ QUOTE ]
As a friend, have you ever talked to him about any of this? It sounds like you haven't. It might ease your mind to know you at least tried and didn't stand idly by.

As a poker player, you can't be worried about him while you're playing.

[/ QUOTE ]

thank gawd someone suggested this. just tell him you're not that comfortable with him borrowing money from you, or whatever problems you got with him. maybe he didn't think it was a big deal.

as for worrying about him, he's a big boy. worry about your own game.