Uncomfortable Situations

[[censored]]

My mom died from Lopus.

[spamuell]

I was in a bar with my friend (Shaun) and a girl from Holland who could speak pretty good English, but we'd occasionally correct her if she misused a word. Her dad had died fairly recently and I knew this but Shaun didn't.

She's showing us photos of her family and she shows us her mother who has brown hair, while the girl's hair is blonde. Shaun says, "Oh your mother has brown hair, does your dad have blonde hair?"
She replies, "No, brown as well. I painted my hair."
Without thinking I say, "Dyed."
She blinks and then says to Shaun, "Yes, my dad did die a few months ago," and then looks at me like I'm the most insensitive person ever.

We're awkwardly silent for a couple of seconds while the whole thing sinks in and I stammer an apology and I explain I was correcting her English, she excuses herself and Shaun and I just crack up in laughter, unable to contain ourselves.

[Rick Diesel]

Fat chick walks into the room. Diesel asks "When are you due?" Fat chick says "I am not pregnant" and then proceeds to cry. Diesel, the insensitive prick, starts laughing. End of story.

[DrPublo]

Last year, very big party. I'm pretty intoxicated and talking with two very good friends, one guy one girl, and one female acquaintance (who's close with the other two people) about trying to hook up with this girl across the room. One of my friends mentions that they think she either has a boyfriend or is just getting out of a serious relationship, not worth trying anything. I say something careless like "Yeah, she probably has herpes anyway, no reason to hit that. Gross."

My two friends faces go sheet white. The acquaintance looks at me and says "I have genital herpes."

The Doc

[mmbt0ne]

</font><blockquote><font class="small">En réponse à:</font><hr />
Last year, very big party. I'm pretty intoxicated and talking with two very good friends, one guy one girl, and one female acquaintance (who's close with the other two people) about trying to hook up with this girl across the room. One of my friends mentions that they think she either has a boyfriend or is just getting out of a serious relationship, not worth trying anything. I say something careless like "Yeah, she probably has herpes anyway, no reason to hit that. Gross."

My two friends faces go sheet white. The acquaintance looks at me and says "I have genital herpes."

The Doc

[/ QUOTE ]

While that might be embarassing, it's the [censored] truth.

[FishBurger]

[ QUOTE ]
My two friends faces go sheet white. The acquaintance looks at me and says "I have genital herpes."


[/ QUOTE ]

That bitch must have other problems if she tells people she doesn't even know that she has herpes. Jesus [censored]' Christ.

[InchoateHand]

I would prefer not to get herpes, but chances are all of us have slept with someone with herpes. Its not that big a deal, and its not like they are gigantic oozing pustules.

Oh, and why would she say that? I would say that, whether or not I had herpes (I don't), because its funny. Making people think they have put their foot in their mouth is hilarious. Its why I take great umbrage at certain remarks (My grandmother had...but I'm a Jew...my stepfather is Black...etc. Good times).

[nothumb]

[ QUOTE ]
I would prefer not to get herpes, but chances are all of us have slept with someone with herpes.

[/ QUOTE ]

This kind of assumes that most of OOT has been laid, which may be a stretch.

And, hard as it may be to believe, those of us who do get laid have not all boned your mom. Yet.

NT

[InchoateHand]

Yeah, your mom was a little bit blunt. I sharpened her up for you though.

Oh, I was alluding to the fact that somewhere in the range of 25% of American adults have genital herpes, even though many are asymptomatic. But yeah, I forget the clear fact that OOT posters are neither in the sexual swimming pool nor the adult population.

PS---You get laid?

[FishBurger]

One time I was flying across country and the plane was doing a lot of bouncing around because the weather was getting pretty rough. As a consequence, I started hitting the liquor pretty hard to calm my nerves. Well, the next thing I know, I'm waking up in a jail cell.

I asked the officer-in-charge what I was doing in jail and he explained that, during the flight, my high state of intoxication led me to get into an argument with one of the stewardesses after she wouldn't give me another drink. I guess I got pretty excited because the officer went on to explain that I expressed my displeasure by jumping up on the food/alcohol cart and defecating. That must have been quite an uncomfortable situation for all the sober people on that flight.