Update 13 making a living playing poker...

[pooppoop]

A dedication to Grannymae

A review of Phil Hellmuth's book" Play Poker Like the Pros"

Lets start by listing the top 10 and only starting cards you should play when starting out in Texas hold'em.
In 7th place is 88. These top ten should always be raised before the flop. As players get used to you're style of not playing many hands, these raises will be met with respect by the other players.
There are several different type of players you will meet in hold'em, among them are elephant(tight player), Jackal(loose player), mouse(a calling station), and one you will rarely meet unless he decides to have some fun bullying and dominating all the players at the lower levels you will be starting at. This such animal is the eagle, but we all know eagles don't hunt fly's so the chances of meeting one will be nil.
When I started out my career in hold'em I met an eagle and he proceeded to take all my money. Being in school it was not much 12$, but to a student that was my meal money for several days. Going to school in Wisconsin is not cheap.
Several weeks passed and i got a job washing dishes. Gathering 9$ I proceeded to the hold'em game and as would be expected i lost it all again. So I made up my mind to learn.
5th place is AQ. I found no poker books in the library so I came up with the top ten hands. I would only play these and no others, the rest is history.
Eventually I took over the game as I had an edge besides the top ten strategy. I found myself being able to know what the other players held in they're hands, even the eagle was brought down by my extra sensory perception.
An example of my powers came in a late night school game against my teachers. By this time the local student game had bored me, there was just no excitement taking they're lunch money. I wanted a car, so I decided to move up to the next level.
These teachers were not easy by any means. Consisting of two jackal and three elephants and every once in a while a raccoon, chipmunk, flying squirrel would stop in. Well this night I had AQ next to the big blind and i raised. seat four a snail raised me, then seat 8 a ostrich raised as well. Flop came 8Q2 turn 3 river A well we all raised till the river. I was feeling good with my two pair till the snail turned over set 8. Who in the hell would cap with set 8, needless to say the hands cost me allot of big blinds and the night did not go well after that as well because later on in the night a blue whale joined our game. What a joke that was.

hmmmm I am a great player hmmmmm I am a great player hmmmmm I'll order a pizza with no cheese tonight hmmmmmm I am the best at tells hmmmm concentrate don't let the WPT disturb my mantra hmmmmmm I excel at jacks hmmmmm I have two plasma TV's hmmmmmm I am a great player hmmmmm.

9th place is 44. I was had QK with only 6 players I raised my bet 10,000. Scotty Nguyen. called.
A Saber tooth called( Now I thought they were extinct but it only goes to show you what I know.)
Flop came Q83 turn 5 at this point saber tooth folded and Scotty bet 15,000. I went all-in and he followed. river 2. Scotty proceeded to show two pair Q2. After I got up from the floor from my tantrum I told him" Great hand Scotty, wow Q2 really a good hand."
The hand hurt but I came back strong, with strong plays. A perfect example of this is Scotty was on BB and he had taken a restroom break. Saying" These Amstel lights are really going trough me." I have no such problem I drink Hamms the all beer refreshing. The dealer dealt the cards as Scotty came back. While he ordered another beer I quickly looked at my cards, seeing a 33 I went all-in. As he reached for his cards I yelled " Don't look at those cards!" It startled him for a bit but he reached again. I stood up and screamed" Don't look I have you were I want you!" He stared at me. I leaned over the table and i whispered" I know you're tells, those cards are no good don't bother even looking." He leaned back and took a sip of beer. Again I whispered" No chance throw it away." Several minutes later as he stared at the tops of his cards he flipped them at the dealer.

1st place Ad

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Damn these interruptions can some one else get the pizza!


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[C M Burns]

I read PH's book, (got it free from ub so no loss) not the greatest book but not totally worthless, I find the limit HE advice somewhat flawed seems like too much of a no limit style, this sections seems more usefull.

But he recomend a beginner stick to his top 10, 77's up AK, AQ. so I was curious how this would do, so using turbo texas holdem (a good program imo) I modified a profile to play only these hands fairly aggresivley like he recomends. adjusting a bit for position etc... I run 100k hands or so and see the results....a pretty big loss in both lose and tight games, and agg/pass.
All the hands are net winners except 77 and 88, small loss, but it seems that not enough hands are played to result in a profit, the blinds seem to get u, and this simulation was w/o a rake.

so perhaps a heads up to u super super tight players.

[jasonHoldEm]

That was great poo...I hope granny got to see it.

peace,
jHE

[happyjaypee]

[ QUOTE ]
but it seems that not enough hands are played to result in a profit, the blinds seem to get u, and this simulation was w/o a rake.


[/ QUOTE ]

Maybe Phil leaned too much on is tournament experience.. anyway. I heared too many bad comments about this book that it makes me wanna buy it to see what's inside...


-Happy [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

[Robk]

But did you program the sim to play the top 10 hands as well as Phil wants you too?

[Mike Haven]

first class review, eagleman

i have printed it out and made it into bedding for my okapi (i bought it because the salesman told me it is "the only mammal that can clean its ears with its tongue" and i thought if i got friendly with it, well ...)

[pokerfunnMyAss]

[ QUOTE ]
order box of style on adultswim.com

[/ QUOTE ]


I never knew I could order some style. What a dork I have needlessly been. Will they take away my "Yes" albums?