Favorite Poker Quotes

[Mikey]

"you keep playing cards like that you are going to be walking atta here with nothing but your dick in your hands."

[Mikey]

a man playing J5o from the blind, flops two pair and wins.
He turns towards the dealer and says....

"You turned [censored] into sherbert."

[Josh W]

I was playing in a NL tourny with Layne Flack two weeks ago. When a weak player continually bluffed into Layne and busted himself, Layne then told the table:

"No need to push when a donkey does the pulling".

Wow. Best I've ever heard.

J

[Copernicus]

Under the heading of "People with more money than brains"

Sat down at 20/40 Omaha, and immediately go 4 bets every round vs a guy with 3 fresh racks in front of him...he throws over his cards saying "Send it...Ive got the nuts." then "What do you mean you can only use 2 pocket cards"?

[johnd]

Not a poker Quote per say but it I think of it often when I play.
Paraphrased

"Conan what is best in life"

"To crush your enemies, drive them before you, and hear the weeping and laminations of their women."

[Aragorn]

"Drinking won't hurt your game much if you are already the worst player at the table."

John Fox

[warlockjd]

Best quote I've seen was from another 2+2er, I think...to a steamer: "Shhhh....I'm trying to count your chips."

[Magician]

"Did you have it?"

"Sorry, John - I can't remember."

[HUSKER'66]

No limit Hold'em.....takes a minute to learn and a lifetime to master.

[Dwayne]

"There are two kinds of card players at this table, those that are lucky and those that don't have it."

"If it weren't for the river there would be no fish."