My failure as a poker pro (very long)

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i don't think i'd ever be able to go seriously go pro for a couple of reasons:

1) i, too, am an addictive gambler.
2) i, too, have horrible bankroll management

after suffering various downswings, i have gained some perspective to it all, but i continue to be a danger to myself whenever i play because i am potentially a bad beat or bad run away where i go do something really retarded like playing above my roll and losing my entire roll.

part of why i enjoy this game is because i can win or lose thousands of dollars a day, yet at the same time it is also part of my problem.

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Wow. Just wow.

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The one thing I don't get, and I know Chris Daddy Cool didn't say he does this, but the OP did, and I hear it many times, is the syndrome where somebody loses big and then goes up to a higher level to try and recoup their losses.

I understand this must be a component of problem gambling, and even a lot of not problem gamblers do it, but vicerally I just don't get it. If I ever take a huge beating (and I'm so over bankrolled that I don't think it'll ever get to that point) there's no way I go to higher stakes, I move down and down until the losing stops hurting or I start winning.

I've only had to drop down once, fortunately, and that was when I was till at the micros. But to me it feels like, geez I'm taking a beating, why in the world would I want to go to higher stakes and take a much worse beating...


--Zetack

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This is because it does not appear that you are a problem gambler.

If you want to understand this pathology, hang out by the table games at your local casino. It won't take long before you see the proporyical "problem gambler". You can usually see it in their eyes - a certain hopeless desperation. When they are on a winning streak, their eyes light up and they become exuberant - and then when they start losing, they look desperate and start to get angry.

Its a pathological behavior that is entirely irrational.

Signs of problem gambling, excerpted from the OP:


I was excited, thought I was the greatest player ever, and promptly went home and bought in for $50 at Party the next day.


I was bragging to people how much money I was winning, making plans to buy plasma tvs and cars and other toys,


I was angry and tilting, yelling at the computer about what terrible fish I was up against, how it made no sense for me to get this unlucky, etc.


I was convinced that I was the victim of bad luck (which was partially true) and bought in for another $50, lost it, bought in for $50 more, lost it, repeated this proccess a bunch of times, overdrawing from my checking account like 10 times ($22 fee for each time) before I decided to take a break.


I would deposit $500 through IGM Pay even though I didn't have any money in my account, play the 10/20 or 15/30 tables, and when the check bounced have the Party guys take it out of my Party account. This happened a few times, I paid a ton in overdraft fees, and by winter break I was broke again.


I spent about a week at home without poker, but I got restless and decided to try poker again.


I was excited, I thought I was the greatest tourney player in the world, and dreamed of all the things I would buy with this money.


I went out leased a nice apartment for $1k a month, financed a car (2004 Infiniti G35), bought a plasma TV, nice furniture, 2 Dell 2001FPs, and my new pro poker career was underway.


This person should never go near another poker game as long as they live.

did anybody else get a good laugh out of this post? i mean, this sht was hilarious!!! hahahaha damn i'm still laughing, sorry. no seriously, i am still laughing [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img].

[david050173]

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did anybody else get a good laugh out of this post? i mean, this sht was hilarious!!! hahahaha damn i'm still laughing, sorry. no seriously, i am still laughing [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img].

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You should got to AA, NA, and GA meeting you would find them entertaining. I think most people find them sad...

[inders]

Thanks for this post, it makes me feel better about moving down in limits due to my latest downswing to preserve my bankroll

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did anybody else get a good laugh out of this post? i mean, this sht was hilarious!!! hahahaha damn i'm still laughing, sorry. no seriously, i am still laughing [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img].

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You should got to AA, NA, and GA meeting you would find them entertaining. I think most people find them sad...

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no way its way funnier over the internet [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Aeioux]

"Poker is not for everyone, and I guess it's not for you. There are certainly a lot more important things in life."

Greg, that is such a refreshing statement to hear from someone on this site that I think a lot of people forget here. There are much more important things in life than this game.

[MicroBob]

Poker is a reasonably fun game...and in live play can be an okay social activity.....and it's a decent source of income for me too.

But I struggle to think of many things in my life that are less important to me than poker.
All ranking more important to me than poker (and it's not even close) include Family, friends, GF, (ummmm....sex), music (playing or listening), travel, rec-league soccer (also 'just a game'), drinking, dining out, my cat, baseball (watching or talking about), cinema, etc etc.

The only aspects that put poker up there in terms of importance is the relative enjoyment I get out of the game (playing and studying/debating) and the fact that the income I make from it allows me to parttake in the other activities such as travel and time with girlfriend more often and at my leisure.


If I magically won $10-million at the WSOP I would not be playing nearly as much poker as I do now.
I would probably travel around and play a few of the big tourneys in the locations I want to travel to....and maybe rarely play on the internet at home if I happen to be kind of bored and relaxing that evening.
But I would pretty much just use my free-time to enjoy more of the things in life that are far more important to me than poker.

[ZeeJustin]

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I went out leased a nice apartment for $1k a month, financed a car (2004 Infiniti G35), bought a plasma TV, nice furniture, 2 Dell 2001FPs, and my new pro poker career was underway.

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this is obviously ZeeJustin

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LOL! He basically described my biggest purchases. I recently moved into a new appartment. It has a 55in plasma TV, a very nice 3 piece leather couch set. I do have 2 of the same minitors, and yes, I have a 2004 G35 (paid for in full, not financed.)

What's the big difference between us? It's not skill. I sucked at poker when I first started, just like everyone else. The biggest two differences are bankroll management, and the will to learn. I was always conservative with my bankroll, and I have always made a huge effort to learn and constantly improve my game. Without these two things, you will most likely end up like the OP. They are CRUCIAL for success at poker.

[lighterjobs]

cocaine is a hell of a drug