Iris' greatest hits

[Dan Druff]

Just in case some of you have been deprived of the great and entertaining opportunity to play with Iris at Commerce (40-80 Hold 'Em), here's a sample of some of her best comments from a particular night I played a few months back. I made note of these at the time to send to some of my friends (and fellow Iris fans), but they're just as entertaining to read today...

"Yes, Jack (the lead floorman), you do have to take this
sort of abuse from me. Either that, or get a real job."

"See Blondie over there (the new chip runner)? I don't
like her. She thinks she's really hot stuff. Instead
of making sure everyone has chips, she stands around
posing all the time, like she fancies herself as some
sort of model. I'm gonna complain to Jack about her."

"Have you seen the woman that guy's going to marry?
Homely. Very homely girl. I don't understand it."

"Look at that pink hair (in reference to the most attractive
of the cocktail waitresses, who now has streaks of pink
towards the back of her hair). It looks ridiculous, like
she's a giant stick of cotton candy. Some people are
so desperate for attention."

"Seat 7 is always emotional. Whether he's winning or losing, the one thing that's constant is that he's always an [censored]."

"My husband and I met at a marketing research conference.
We were both married and ended up having affairs. Soon after, we both got divorced and married each other."

--

Maybe Iris does have some pull after all! That "Blondie" she referred to did indeed vanish from Commerce shortly thereafter. (Actually, I'm sure it had nothing to do with Iris, but it's just fun to think that it did.)

On a side note, did you all know that Iris is a Jewish grandmother? I just can't seem to picture her cooking chicken soup and reading stories to children...

-Dan Druff

[andyfox]

My favorite is "scramble the cards, beauty." She uses "beauty" to insult the dealers when they have the audacity to deal a winning hand to anyone other than her. Then, if they're Asian, she imitates their speech in a racist attempt to be nasty.

She likes to sit in seats 2,3,7 or 8 and then she puts her mucked cards, or, if she's in the pot, her chips, as far away as possible from the dealer so as to both slow up the game and make the dealer, especially if it's a small woman, reach over uncomfortably to get the cards or chips.

She must hate herself. Only a person who is so uncomfortable with herself could be so nasty to other people. She's a disgrace and ought to be barred from the club for the way she treats the dealers and other players.

[sierra 1]

my mother,a"jewish grandmother"would drive to Reno from SF and play the dollar slots on the 7th floor of Harrahs.The floor man would rope off a row of slots and Sophie would run back and forth putting a coin in each machine and pull the handel.Sophie would abuse the floorman,change people and bartenders no end. She always played on the 7th floor being closer to God,it made her lucky.
Sophie was a political activist of the 40s and 50s.She was always telling my kids stories of Marx and Freud and singing them songs on the troubles of the working class,telling them folktales of eastern europe,fiddeler on the roof stuff.My children adored her.
Years ago I played lowball in Gardena with many woman like Iris and Sophie.They were a big pain to play with but the card clubs were very dependent on thier time collection.Iris may be among the last of a group of players we wont see again.My Moms chicken soup,whiele marvelous,never helped my poker game.

[sierra 1]

Andy, I would never condone the type of behavior you describe of Iris. Racist remarkes anywhere are downright ugly and rude.I was trying to describe a player who was fairly common around LA in the 50s Sounds like Iris has a mean streak and carries this stuff to extreme.