Brutal Honesty

[jasonHoldEm]

Below is a copy of my recent blog entry. When I first wrote this I seriously considered not making it public because it deals with some very private issues, but in the end I thought it was worthwhile to share.

I decided to cross-post in Psychology because the issue at hand deals a lot more with me as a person than me as a player and this is probably the best place to get feedback.

Trolls will be ignored, helpful advice is apreciated.

Thanks,
Jason

----

I'd like to thank everyone who responded to my previous post. I also spoke with some friends via email/PM/chat and would like to thank those guys as well. I received a lot of solid advice and appreciate the time everyone took to help me out.

As you might have noticed I've decided to do away with the Sophomore Poker Project. It wasn't an easy decision, but I now feel it is for the best. There were a lot of things I liked about the project, but in the end it was flawed and those flaws were its ultimate downfall. Basically, you can't base your decision to move up in limits on an (arbitrary) number. You can only move up when you're ready. There were a lot of good things in the project, and I plan to incorporate those into my everyday life. So I'm not really giving up on the ideals behind the project, just going in a different direction.

I've done some thinking and I know this might sound silly, but play along with me...

I want to become a successful middle limit player (lets say 30/60 since that's roughly the middle of the middle limits). In order to become a successful 30/60 player I need to be a successful 15/30 player. In order to become a successful 15/30 player I need to be a successful 10/20 player. In order to become a successful 10/20 player I need to be a successful 5/10 player. In order to become a successful 5/10 player I need to be a successful 3/6 player....hmmm.

I know that sounds obvious, but one of the problems with the project was that I was thinking about what it would be like to play 30/60 when I should have been concentrating on playing 3/6. I got overly excited about what could happen in the future instead of focusing on what was happening right now. It's a simple mistake, and I think realizing it will do much more to improve my game than all the fancy projects and plans ever could.

Last night I was reading an essay by Mason Malmuth concerning moving up. He suggests that you should have between 100 and 500 hours of winning play at a given limit before you consider moving up to a higher level. So I can clearly state I'm a winning 2/4 player, but given my results at 3/6 I still have somewhere between 100 to 500 hours left before I can declare myself a winner at that level (feel free to read between the lines and get the joke). It was an eye opening experience because it made me realize just how far I have to go....it was also the final straw concerning the project as I could have easily hit a lucky streak, reached that magic number and moved up to 5/10 before I was ready

There are a lot of leaks in my game that I need to plug. Some of my mistakes are pretty basic and will be easy to fix, others are more complex and will require more time before they can be sorted out. This is why spending 100-500 of winning experience at each level is so important, not because there is anything to prove by playing for that many hours, but because it takes that long to find some of the deeper mistakes (mistakes that will burn you when you move up to the next level, because those players have already fixed them). I felt like both a genius and a dumbass when I figured this out.

Getting rid of the project has simplified my life considerably and will allow me to take that time I was "wasting" and apply it in better ways. There was a random "Newbie looking for advice" post on 2+2 this weekend and Dynasty replied in his typical somewhat sarcastic, but really just cutting through the bullsh!t type response, "Read every post in the small stakes forum for the next six months."

I like it when people cut through the crap as it was a good slap in the face for me as well. If you're familiar with the forums at 2+2 you know that each board is somewhat of a clique (or perhaps a better word would be community). Most of my time at 2+2 has been spent in the zoo (internet gambling). I've developed some good friendships on that board, but it has also "prevented" me from wandering out to the other forums as much as I should.

The zoo is probably the most tightly knit group, but the (drawback?) of the forum is that there isn't a lot of strategy discussion. In the past I've improved my strategy by reading books or working with my poker coach, while basically ignoring the massive resource that is the 2+2 strategy forums. This is going to change.

Going hand in hand with that, I need to take a more proactive approach to examining my own play. I do this on a limited level now, but no where near as deeply as I should be if I really want to become a successful player. To be brutally honest, I gloss over a lot of my mistakes because I'm overconfident in my ability. I've had the necessary tools (poker tracker, 2+2, my poker coach, etc) available for quite some time, but the final piece of the equation (myself) has been missing. This is going to change.

All of the above, as well as not playing enough hours, points to a discipline problem on my part. During the last few days I've been doing some serious soul searching, and the most important thing I've realized is that I really do control my own destiny. If this is what I want I need to get my ass in gear and put in the work necessary to achieve my goals.

I don't want to sound like a jerk, but I'm a pretty smart person and in general smart people are lazy because they can rely on their intelligence to make up the difference between them and people who have to work to get to where they are. I've realized the "wall" I'm hitting at 3/6 isn't because of bad luck, it's because 3/6 is the apex of how far I can go on intelligence alone. If I want to move higher on the totem pole I need to start applying what I know and take a more disciplined approach to my game (and my life).

It's clear to me the next couple months will make or break me as a (serious) player. There are some tough lessons ahead, but I'm not really afraid of them. I'm confident if I can survive my trial by fire I'll emerge a successful player and a better person.

[Al Schoonmaker]

Jason,
Your post was very impressive.
1. You were self-critical. Many people are not. You have identified some (unspecified) leaks and are apparently trying to plug them. Since you have't been specific, I can't say whether your plans are realistic. I suggest you get much more specific.
2. You recognized that you have to move slowly, that you should move up ONLY after you proved you can beat your current level for hundreds of hours. Many people move too quickly, and a few fools claim they should move up because the weak players at their current level beat them with their stupidity! (You can't put them on hands because they don't know what they are doing, etc.)
3. You have a coach. Hardly any low limit players have one, and I believe a coach is absolutely essential for virtually everyone.
4. You've accepted responsibility for your own development. An astonishing number of people, including many alleged "pros," never really accept it. They blame others or the poker gods for their problems.
5. You seem to be genuinely interested in getting hard criticism. Without it, you really can't develop. I think you'll find that many people here have the same general approach as Dynasty. He doesn't post here often, but many of us have read and admired his posts here and on other forums.
I'd encourage you to start a poker discussion group or to attend meetings of ours whenever you're in Las Vegas. You can read about us at cardplayer.com, click on magazine, writers, and my name. The same invitation is extended to everyone else. We welcome visitors and have had them from all over America and from at least five foreign countries.
I also hope you become part of this "community." Since I rarely get to the internet gambling forum, I can't make comparisons to it. However, I think you'll find that we do have a number of regulars and do take each other seriously and try to be helpful.
Hope we see more of you.
Regards,
Al

[GrannyMae]

Since I rarely get to the internet gambling forum, I can't make comparisons to it

we could use you to class the place up a bit doc. beleive it or not, some of the most prolific posters there derive great pleasure from assistang and encouraging younger players.

our responses are not nearly as eloquent as your's was, but we would take that eloquence any day ! how about a post every now and then while lurking?

[jasonHoldEm]

Thanks for your response Dr. Al, I was hoping you'd see this.

My leaks (the ones I'm aware of at least) are also discipline related, for example calling down when I know I'm beaten or pushing overcards too hard when I miss...elementary stuff that I should have fixed a long time ago. I'm sure there are many others I haven't found yet.

Discussing poker in "real life" isn't something I get a chance to do very much of unfortunately. I'm moving in with a friend in the next couple weeks and plan to teach him the game just so I have someone to discuss hands with without having to sit in front of a computer.

My life is in a bit of flux right now, but Vegas is one of the areas I'm considering moving to in 2005 (arizona and california being some of the others). If I end up in vegas permanently or just on a trip I will definitely ( [img]/images/graemlins/tongue.gif[/img] felicia) stop by the WPDG.

With no disrespect intended towards the zoo I plan to cut back my activity there somewhat so I can be more active in the other forums (psychology and small stakes being the two I want to follow the most), so expect to see more of me on a regular basis. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Thanks again,
Jason

[umdpoker]

hey jason, i just went through a realization much like yours. i moved up too fast and got overly cocky without the skills to back up my ego. its tough to move down in limits to fix leaks, but it is necessary if you ever want to become an excellent player. good luck.

[pretender2k]

As much as you all chastize "Rounders" wasn't this the basic lesson to be taken away from the movie. Something like "I was playing the hand and thinking about playing the WSOP". Am I the only one that plays that movie while thay sleep just to remind myself why I want to play at least 10,000 hands at each level and win at least the minimum bankroll to play the next level. Not that I am the most disciplined player, I have broken every rule that I make a hundred times but to my credit I can also humbly drop a level and start over. This is why I am not playing 2/4 today and also why I am still playing today.

[Lawrence Ng]

Nice post Jason,

I am reminded constantly about how the richest man in the world - William Gates plays only 3/6 poker when he visits Vegas and the Mirage. He has the ability, focus, and bankroll to play 300,000/600,000 if he wanted to. He plays whatever he feels comfortable playing.

I think I will actually cut and paste this post into into my poker journals if you are ok with that. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

Lawrence

[Mike Gallo]

Jason,

Awesome post.

[TylerD]

I don't think its a case of him being uncomfortable playing high limits (well maybe 300k/600k - is that ever spread?) its just that 3/6 and 3000/6000 probably mean the same to him - nothing.

Nice post btw Jason.

[bigphats]

Hello all this is my forst post on these forums, though i have been devouring the information here for the past month.

jason, i have gone through the same situation as you. i started playing hold'em when a freind of mine got me interested a while back. i have played other card games my whole life and have had quite a bit of success. so when i started playing hold'em i climbed pretty fast on the learning curve. needless to say i got a little overconfident. i started out playin 2/4 at the local casino and had about 5 sessions in a row were i doubled my buy in. i thought what the hell i should play 5/10 and double my proffits. well the first time i did i was at table full of rocks who ended getting about 300 off me before i left. i was dejected to say the least. but i took the loss and looked into myself and realised that i control the whole situation. i was at a table were i was out gunned and didnt have the balls to get up and walk away. well the next time i went back the 2/4 game was full and i decided to sit down at the 5/10 and play very tight until my 2/4 game was open. well this time i was up about 100 dollars and they called my name for the 2/4 game and i got up and moved to the lower table. i got some wierd looks from the guys at the table, but i just smiled cause i knew that i was going into a game were i was a favorite and not on even ground with everyone.

i guess what i am trying to say is that the hardest person to beat at the table is yourself. when you realise this, it opens a whole new dimension to your game that will alow you to become better player.

later
big