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  #1  
Old 05-05-2005, 01:51 PM
Iceman Iceman is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2003
Posts: 87
Default The Perils of Personal Ads

A woman finds out that her husband is answering "casual encounters" personal ads, so she posts a fake ad and waits for him to respond. He answers her fake ad without realizing that it's her, and this is the result:

I'm the Chappaqua blonde, grey eyes, great smile and skin, 115, who was looking for a married man, 40-45, reasonably fit, must send pic etc etc.

I found my guy - the exact guy, in fact, that I was looking for from the outset: my philandering husband. To the other 250+ married creeps who replied over the last two days - you should all pray your wives don't catch you out like this. Its so easy and obvious...one doubts your collective intelligence. BTW, the 'meeting' at Starbucks in Greenwich never happened. I thought it made for good 'realism' though.

Andy:

We won't be meeting next Tuesday at the Yorktown Starbucks. I have moved to my sister's house. "Jenni" who you spoke with on the phone was an actress and probably earned the easiest $500 of her life. My lawyer taped the conversation. My lawyer also has a copy of your response to my ad, and transcipts of our three IM conversations.

To send "Jenni" a pic, including me with my face blacked out, taken at our anniversary party, was utterly unbelievable and underscores the contempt you apparantly have for me.

I've also taken the PC and your other laptop. My lawyer will have a computer expert check them. I suspect you've done this more than once.

No doubt you think you've been very clever. I suspected something was wrong in February when M****** told me that you and C****** had been talking about internet "dating" at the club. C****** told M****** that you seemed very knowledgeable about it and that you had mentioned Craig's List casuals several times.

I'm not heartbroken now. That was yesterday. You've lost a wife who adored you. Faith is a two way deal and you blew it. You are an a-hole and a complete [censored].

I've left a print out of this on the kitchen counter although I suspect you'll probably read this online before you get home, when you next check out the casuals.

I have had somebody remove and destroy our bed. When you get home you can sleep in the guest room. I have cancelled our dinner with J* and P**** Friday night. I have told my parents that we are divorcing and why. You should speak to your father. You should understand that as a consequence of your actions you will cause great sadness and heartbreak to a good man who has shown me nothing but affection, and whom I love dearly.

I've put all the jewelry, and the wedding ring you gave me, into the storm drain at the end of the road. I've sent your mother's rings back to you father by recorded delivery. I didn't enclose a note - you can explain to him.

I have an appointment for a full STD check this afternoon. If I have the merest hint of any infection, I will send copies of your email, the IM chat and the pic you sent, to all our friends, your family and your work colleagues. Believe me, you will understand the meaning of the saying "revenge is a dish best served cold". I suggest you say a prayer that you haven't given me anything.

I'll see you in court. Don't call me - if you do, my lawyer will get a protection order against you.

Jennifer
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  #2  
Old 05-05-2005, 01:55 PM
hogua hogua is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 279
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

Good for her!!

Also, good for the local storm drain cleaning crew...

[ QUOTE ]
I've put all the jewelry, and the wedding ring you
gave me, into the storm drain at the end of the road.


[/ QUOTE ]
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  #3  
Old 05-05-2005, 01:58 PM
kipin kipin is offline
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Northern, VA
Posts: 30
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

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  #4  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:25 PM
asofel asofel is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: brilliant in my opinion
Posts: 555
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

I worried momentarily for Jake....
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  #5  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:30 PM
usmfan usmfan is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 43
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

[ QUOTE ]
I worried momentarily for Jake....

[/ QUOTE ]
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  #6  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:30 PM
Shajen Shajen is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Oops, I crapped my pants.
Posts: 1,530
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

HALF, EDDIE. I WANT HALF.

You didn't tell me I could have half Eddie.


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  #7  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:31 PM
RunDownHouse RunDownHouse is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 165
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

[ QUOTE ]
I've put all the jewelry, and the wedding ring you gave me, into the storm drain at the end of the road. I've sent your mother's rings back to you father by recorded delivery. I didn't enclose a note - you can explain to him.

I have an appointment for a full STD check this afternoon. If I have the merest hint of any infection, I will send copies of your email, the IM chat and the pic you sent, to all our friends, your family and your work colleagues. Believe me, you will understand the meaning of the saying "revenge is a dish best served cold".

[/ QUOTE ]

Doesn't sound like cold, deliberate action at all to me. She should go read The Count of Monte Christo again.

Besides, if she actually sent those emails or whatever to people, isn't she risking legal repercussions herself?
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  #8  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:31 PM
YourFoxyGrandma YourFoxyGrandma is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Voices & animatic.
Posts: 514
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

That's friggin' sweet.
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  #9  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:39 PM
purnell purnell is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 154
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned", or something like that.
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  #10  
Old 05-05-2005, 02:44 PM
Slow Play Ray Slow Play Ray is offline
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Beantown
Posts: 527
Default Re: The Perils of Personal Ads

wow that's great! do you have the link for this?
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