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View Poll Results: What's your play?
2 unit pre-flop raise 30 83.33%
Min-raise 0 0%
Limp and hope someone else raises pre-flop 3 8.33%
Push 3 8.33%
Voters: 36. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
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Old 11-17-2005, 06:56 AM
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Default Girl Dilemma

I meant to post this earlier, but it took me a little longer to finish because my conscience kept me from concentrating. Something involving 5000 BB's, whatever those might be.

Anyway.. I'll try to keep it short and to the point. I trimmed my story down to the relevant facts:

The Hero
20 years old. Dutch. Student.. well.. sort of. OK-looking, nothing special. Less attractive than the girl, though.

The Girl
From Moscow. Cute (I've had this confirmed). Intelligent. Brunette, which happens to be our hero's preference. Speaks English. Sweet. Modest. Has moral standards.
Not: connected, a stripper, a hooker, or otherwise after my money.
Previously (four months ago) had a long-term relationship.
We'll call her Natasha.

The Facts
Met her last month when I was visiting for a tournament. Spent a few days with her. It was romantic, especially by my standards. We've called once, maybe twice a week. She wants me to visit again. I will almost certainly be in town anyway at the end of January, regardless of her. The earliest possibility before that will be a month from now, because of exams and visa/passport issues. Cash and time required are basically a non-issue for me. Only issue is that I don't have enough ties to the city to keep me busy on a regular basis if Natasha isn't available. She can come to Holland, but I'd have to pay and it takes considerable time and effort to get a visa.

The Dilemma
Should I pursue a relationship with this girl or not?

Some more points to consider:
- I assume she wants a relationship. But she's a woman, and she's Russian. So I guess I'll never figure her out 100%. She does tell me she thinks about me all the time. I'm fairly positive that if she does want me, she wants me emotionally, not financially.
- If I do start something with her, I'd be committed to a girl I have the OPTION to see once a month, maybe more if I make short visits. This means that 3/4th of the time, if I want her I'm SOL.
- I have no plans to live together at this point in my live, either in Holland or in Russia. Should there be a relationship, I see little future in the short term. But I don't like the idea of committing long-term.
- If I were to engage in a friends with benefits relationship - actually, that's the current status - I'd be free to live my life as I want and sleep with whomever I want. However, I don't want her to to the same, I'd feel hurt. There is even the possibility for me to get away with sleeping around while she doesn't, even if I do tell her. But I'm not sure I could do that to her.
- I'd be in a relationship where more often than not, I don't have the option to be with her. I feel that this point deserves to be stressed twice.

Rereading all this logically points me towards no relationship. That's the advice I would give a friend. Last point: assume I have enough feelings for this girl to make it a close call. I'm gonna have to ask you for guidance. Please elaborate, and point out anything that I might have overlooked. Thanks.
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