So I Kicked an Old Lady to the Curb Tonite (long)

[EMcWilliams]

You did what needed to be done. I dont take lip from anyone, especially a grandma that is annoying in my own house.

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Well played. That takes balls.

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[Isura]

Good story. BTW, the Lions will always suck. I came to that realization 3 years ago and I've been happier since. You should try it.

[Doc7]

http://cgi.ebay.com/Buy-my-NFL-fan-loyal...1QQcmdZViewItem

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For nearly 25 years I have been a loyal Detroit Lions fan. But one fan can only take so much loosing. The 2005 season began with excitement that the franchise had finally built a solid team. However its been proven that solid talent will not give a team a winning season. To recap...

The Lions won their first game against division rival Green Bay (17-3), but were humiliated by the Bears in the second game (38-6). The Lions then lost a close game to the Tampa Bay Buccaneers after a seemingly game winning touchdown was reviewed and controversially reversed (17-13). However, the Lions went to 2-2 after a win against the Baltimore Ravens (35-17). After a last-second loss to the Carolina Panthers (21-20), Jeff Garcia was named the starting quarterback, and he led the Lions to a 13-10 win over Cleveland in Week 7. However the Lions went into week 8 and lost to the Bears once again. Garcia threw a heartbreaking interception in OT which the Bears returned for a TD (19-13). The next week, the Lions had high hopes as Joey Harrington was reinserted as the starter vs. the troubled Minnesota Vikings. However the Lions went down early and lost 27-14. The Lions did get a 29-21 win in week 10 against the Arizona Cardinals. However, losses to the Dallas Cowboys, 20-7, and the Atlanta Falcons on Thanksgiving, 27-7, pushed their regular season record to 4-7. As a result, head coach Steve Mariucci was fired a few days later on November 28, and Dick Jauron was named interim head coach. Why Matt Millen was not fired still remains a mystery. After the release of Mariucci, Cornerback Dré Bly, placed the blame on Harrington, saying that "he [Harrington] had been there for 4 years and had not done anything for the team. (finally someone speaks the truth!)" Bly later apologized for his statement. (why apologize for the truth?)

Things only got worse for the Lions. They lost their Week 13 home game to the Minnesota Vikings 27-7 and then dropped to 4-9 with a Week 14 road loss at Lambeau Field in overtime 16-13 to the Green Bay Packers. To loose to a team that was 2-10 just hurts. And now its time for a change...

I'm selling my fan loyalty National Football League fan to the highest bidder.

As the winner of this auction I will become a fan for the NFL team of your choice!

The winning bidder will get to pick my new favorite NFL team. For a term of 2 years I will be a dedicated and loyal fan to the team of your choice. Regardless of their wins or losses I will remain faithful as a fan and cheer under good times and bad. (its can't be any worse than being a Lions fan)

My promise to the winner of this auction naming my new favorite NFL team is:

* I'll watch televised games and cheer proudly for my new favorite team
* I will discuss my new team with co workers after the Sunday or Monday game (regardless win/ loose)
* Any and all NFL apparel I purchase will now be that of my new favorite team
* When that team plays my once favorite Lions I will attempt to purchase tickets to that game and cheer for my new favorite team
* If bidding exceeds $100 I will immediately purchase the jersey of my new favorite team to be worn on Football Sundays/ Monday night games
* If my new favorite team makes it to the Super Bowl I will host a party in honor of my new favorite team
* Finally and most importantly I promise to be dedicated, loyal and committed to my new favorite team

Post this auction, if General Manager- Matt Millen is FIRED I will immediately refund 50% of the closing auction price to you. I would still remain a #1 fan of my new team but just be happy that some justice has been served in Detroit to all of the other loyal fans. The winner of this auction reserves all rights to name my new favorite team, if they wish to choose the Detroit Lions as my continued favorite team there will be a service charge of $5 charged for emotional distress and suffering.

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Congrats. Didn't read the post, your subject heading was enough.

[SmileyEH]

Excellent.

-SmileyEH

[-Skeme-]

Your kid needs to stop throwing [censored].

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http://cgi.ebay.com/Buy-my-NFL-fan-l...QQcmdZViewItem


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That... is... AWESOME. I am this close to bidding on that.

And fwiw, I agree that the line was correct on every street in that story. Don't think I'd have the balls to do it myself, but good work.

[Sooga]

Your only mistake was not kicking her bitch-ass out sooner.

No way you called her an old bat. Thats kinda harsh, but I like that you had the balls to kick her out. Grandmas can suck real bad sumtimes, grandpas dont seem to suck as bad.