I know it's good to only play in +EV situations but...

parappa · #1 08-19-2005, 02:56 PM

...over the course of my poker career I've developed this compulsion where I hate to play unless I have a huge edge. If my tournament is tight and tough, I'll drop back down to the lower level where I can beat the hell out of the other players. In limit, I'll drop down from a tough-but-beatable $2/$4 game all the way to a .5/1 game that I can 4-table while watching television.

My bankroll is gargantuan for the levels I play. I know I'm a better player than the levels I'm playing, but every time I move up, I find it so uncomfortable that I only play a few tournaments/sessions before I move back down into my comfort zone.

And it's not that I'm having the "running bad at the higher level" problem, either. I'm a winner at all the levels I've tried (up to $2/4 limit and $22 sngs), though the results at the top levels are far from significant--all I can really know is that I'm not getting radically outplayed, and I do subjectively know that. It's just that the bigger amounts of money, or the tougher competition, I don't know, freak me out and I retreat.

So, I've got the limit skills to be at least a break-even player at $2/$4 and I am a solid winner at $1/2 over 20k+ hands, but you'll catch me clearing bonuses at .5/1 on Party simply because I'm much more comfortable with a massive edge. In sngs, I'm legitimately at least a $22s player, but I've played in excess of 1000 $11s with a 25+% ROI, and it's not all that unusual to find me in the $5.50s some days.

Why does it matter? It's costing me money. I'm not god's gift to poker, but my competence is legitimately higher than the levels at which I play. I make a substantial portion of my income from poker and others with comparable skill levels make more simply by playing higher.

A lot of this is variance-phobia. Losing sessions really upset me and I haven't learned to deal with it. While I can easily deal with losing sessions in casino bonuses, every time I have a losing session at limit poker I walk away feeling like there's something wrong with my game.

My bankroll is static at $10k, and I've begun simply paying bills out of the excess because the limits I'm playing at in no way implicate the bankroll size I have but I need to keep it around should I ever start playing higher.

Why's it bothering me? Because there is a significant opportunity out there for me to be making more money than I am, and I feel like I'm wasting it.

Anyway, any thoughts appreciated.

BZ_Zorro · #2 08-19-2005, 03:05 PM

[ QUOTE ]
but my competence is legitimately higher than the levels at which I play.

[/ QUOTE ]
Somewhere, your actual competence fails to match your beliefs about your own competence. Or vice versa.

This is the answer.

wutevahung · #3 08-19-2005, 03:28 PM

either get used to it or quit gambling.

WhiteWolf · #4 08-19-2005, 04:50 PM

Who says you have to squeeze every last bit of profit out of poker? If you are having fun playing at your current levels + are making money, and moving up causes you to stop having fun, I say just stay where you are at.

EnderIII · #5 08-19-2005, 05:35 PM

I have struggled with and continue to struggle with this same issue. I think part of it has to deal with being a huge winner at low levels feels better than being a small winner at higher levels, even if you might be making more money at a higher level, since it is a smaller proportion it feels as if you are not playing as well.

Part of the problem too is that a play style that crushes the 10+1s is generally reliant on the gross errors of the other players (well at least mine is), with fewer bad players at higher levels there is less 'free' money to be given to you.

I have two recommendations for dealing with this problem --

1. Go to vegas and play in tournaments there --the smallest buyin is significantly larger than anything you'll find online, but the lowest buy-ins attract the worst players and you should find yourself in a familiar place of being a large favorite but also be risking more money than you are used to. I think this helps divorce some of your attachment to money.

2. Play some low buyin rebuy tournaments online and be preprared to rebuy as many times as necessary. This will get you used to spending more money on one tournament from time to time (or all the time if its on party)

And i guess a third possibility is to determine if moving up and playing only one or two tables actually is a greater hourly rate than 4 tabling the 10+1s. I know you may be thinking long term and eventually be able to 4 table higher levels as well, but if you are at all variance averse, which it seems that you are, the notion of dropping 220$ when you bust out of all 4 tables in a set of 50+5s will probably make you want to puke, so be wary that as well.

Best of luck,
EnderIII

Reef · #6 08-19-2005, 07:08 PM

you're probably not comfortable with the bet sizes/swings. You should just sit down at a 5/10 table... say [censored] it. And try to play your best. Then the 2/4 won't seem as intimidating

EnderIII · #7 08-19-2005, 07:15 PM

awesome avatar...that is all

MustangMarc · #8 08-20-2005, 04:09 AM

People have emotional issues with money. Everyone knows about fear and greed, but it's more complicated than that.

How was money treated in your home when you were growing up? Most of us don't ask questions of ourselves like that, but it's important to know how we relate emotionally to money, because we certainly don't always relate to it rationally.

I highly recommend books by Suze Orman. She gives advice on personal finances, but instead of just focusing on what investment strategies have the highest +EV, she gets into the psychology of money and risk. I think you might find some help there.

Marc