The Seductive Brutalities of Poker

The Game of Poker can bare the soul and inner ego of many people. Poker shows the visceral side of a number of players. It also grinds and grins at the vicissitudes of life.


People react to it and become part of the Game of Poker for various reasons. Not all of those reasons side with the better part of human nature - at least for some people. I have personally witnessed the self-destructive and abusive behavior that inflicts some people that play this game. It is an ugly side to poker that most people do not wish to even talk about.


We all know that the Game of Poker as many benefits and rewards and challenges and can make people better human beings. It is just not a given that it is true in all cases.


-Zeno

Andy:


I, like Tommy, would never have thought to associate "card-thrower" with the foregoing description. Actually I wouldn't be surprised if recreational players who hold full-time jobs or own businesses might not throw cards considerably more, on average, than pros. Aspiring pros, that might be different.

My experience has been that the "regulars" (pros or semi-pros) are more abusive than non-regulars. I imagine that has to do with being more comfortable in the cardroom and thus less guarded about things.

"It's already too painful to think about without the addition of mistakes."


i dont want what im about to say to come off as critical of caro either. but i think this above is a very harmful immature attitude to have(obviously). i used to sometimes feel this way when i would lose but now when i lose i can actually take solace in all the mistakes i made, i can see all the hands i justified playing when i was really just fulfilling some sick need to gamble. it's awesome, because when you recognize your playing was flawed you can set forth the next session with a refined attitude that you will play tighter and stronger than ever.


conclusions like these have made a very significant impact on my game.


one other thing, now that im rambling: i think it's good to sometimes let off a little steam momentarily when you lose a tough hand. i think it's okay to throw your cards into the muck (not at the dealer or a player), to say a cuss word (not at the dealer or a player), to get up and slam your fists or something temporarily ANGRY and uncontrolled. doing it too often will tear your image to shreds, but doing it every once in awhile can be productive and help ensure that anger doesnt come out in the much more dangerous form of tilted awful play.

I agree. I think the non-regulars are better behaved than the regulars. I definitely find myself with much less patience with cardroom personnel as I become more comfortable in the rooms. There needs to be a better balance of keeping the regulars happy AND under control in order to make the non-regulars comfortable and turn them into regulars, though.


DN

I think it's more simple than that. A lot of "regular" poker players are just not nice types. They might have good "people reading" skills, but they a lot of them aren't what you call "people persons". Many of the "pros" in AC mid and high limit games are just flat out mean jerks. They are friendly enough to other regulars for whom they show "respect", but everyone else is just seen as a walking ATM machine. A lot of these players fall into two categories: either a. nobodies outside the poker world who use poker as a vehicle to gain respect, or b. bullies who find out that they can't get away with doing that stuff if they are trying to earn a paycheck from The Man.


I can't speak for the West Coast, but the amount of times I was sitting at a table in AC or Foxwoods and surrounded by a. criminals, b. drug or gambling addicts, or c. surly jerks got me fed up with it and helped me make the now almost total transition to online poker.

You wrote (in part):


BEGIN (Andy Fox)


Here's what Mike Caro said about losing many years ago:


"I cope with losing very badly. I think I have a feeling of persecution. That the unknown is persecuting me. I tend to think about mistakes a lot less when I've had a big loss. In fact I think I try to justify big losses by not wanting to think I've made any mistkes. It's already too painful to think about without the addition of mistakes."


END (Andy Fox)


Where did that quote come from? I don't deny that I wrote this, but it differs from what I've said in the past. I try never to let losing bother me, and that's basic to my entire philosophy about poker. I'm known for having fun and giggling when I lose. If you tell me where this came from, I'll be able to consider it in context.


Straight Flushes,

Mike Caro (caro@caro.com)

Nice to see you here, Mike, or I should say, read you here. I got the quote from David Hayano's book "Poker Faces." It had been many years since I read it, but for some reason, that quote always stayed in my mind, so I looked it up again when it seemed germane to this discussion . It's on page 102 in the chapter entitled "Losers Walk" and it was the entire quote. My copy of the book says copyright 1982, so if you indeed said this to David, it was certainly quite a long time ago, as I pointed out in my original post.

Why do you assume that "Crazy Mike" was indeed Mike Caro? I haven't read the book in a while but I don't remember "Mike Caro" ever mentioned, quoted, or described.