Is alcohol the answer? If so, straighten me out OOT

ClaytonN · #1 11-15-2005, 04:12 AM

I have gotten involved with four seperate chicks since college started and failed to get to third base with any of them. None of them really were into drinking, and had brains. Yeah, I followed Dominic's advice. The last girl was guaranteed to go far were it not for another guy across the country. But alas...

So, the main point of the post: None of them drank. I don't drink.

Why is this?

Sophomore year of highschool before I even touched alcohol I was involved in a heavy concussion playing football with friends that left me conscious but "not there" for 6 hours. Easily the scariest couple of days in my life, waking up and having amnesia, remembering crap over again, losing all four front teeth, nast nasty situation.

I can't get past this episode whenever I get close to alcohol. I just have a fear of not being in control of my senses, so I've never gotten close to drinking too much.

The main trend among the girls I was unsuccessful with is the lack of partying and drinking. I'm gonna be a changed man, dammit, with early New Year's resolutions.

What I am asking of OOT is the following:
-How vital is alcohol for the women? Any books on good liquors and alcohols to "learn into"? Remember I'm a newbie. Give details. Educate me where you can so I don't do something stupid like you did

-How can I get over this stupid ass fear of blacking out or passing out? I really think I'm missing out on a good time and I'll be goddammed if I have to wait any longer before getting some college tail.

CN

scotty34 · #2 11-15-2005, 04:14 AM

Alcohol is great fun in moderation.

Is it vital for getting with chicks? Absolutely not. Does it help? Absolutely.

housenuts · #3 11-15-2005, 04:18 AM

just start buying a 6-pack or so when you go to parties. see how that treats you. it won't get you anywhere close to blacking/passing out.

as for getting with chics, it is definitely a catalyst.

Goodnews · #4 11-15-2005, 04:16 AM

i seriously hope you are joking

uw_madtown · #5 11-15-2005, 04:17 AM

[ QUOTE ]
-How can I get over this stupid ass fear of blacking out or passing out? I really think I'm missing out on a good time and I'll be goddammed if I have to wait any longer before getting some college tail.

[/ QUOTE ]

By not drinking 3240978234 drinks your first time?

Seriously, there's nothing wrong with not drinking if you don't want to. And just drinking isn't going to help you when, no offense, it sounds like you're trying too hard. But as for fear of losing control/blacking out, just take it easy. Feel out your tolerance, keep it to 6-7 drinks over the first night, slow down when you start feeling buzzed, etc. Don't tell people you're with that it's your first time drinking a little heavier, so you don't have to worry about stupid peer pressure to start doing insane amounts of shots.

Just chill out, do your thing, and drink a few. Then a few more.

ClaytonN · #6 11-15-2005, 04:38 AM

[ QUOTE ]
And just drinking isn't going to help you when, no offense, it sounds like you're trying too hard.

[/ QUOTE ]

Can you blame me? I've got a bs phobia of alcohol, am intimimated by girls that drink and party, and only hook up with girls sober w/ something meaningful there but then they have something wrong with them and they dont go out and party. And nothing is happening.

I want so badly to fit in, bang normal chicks, have a good time. I plan on rushing in the spring.

I want to live the right college experience but with the way my life has panned out until now, I think I really gotta learn up or I could do something really stupid.

PoBoy321 · #7 11-15-2005, 04:44 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Can you blame me? I've got a bs phobia of alcohol, am intimimated by girls that drink and party, and only hook up with girls sober w/ something meaningful there but then they have something wrong with them and they dont go out and party. And nothing is happening.

I want so badly to fit in, bang normal chicks, have a good time. I plan on rushing in the spring.

I want to live the right college experience but with the way my life has panned out until now, I think I really gotta learn up or I could do something really stupid.

[/ QUOTE ]

Believe me, I feel for you, but alcohol isn't going to solve any of this. A lot of people in college don't drink and have a great time. A lot of people in college drink and have a miserable time. They key is finding something you love doing and that makes you happy, and drinking certainly doesn't have to be it.

uw_madtown · #8 11-15-2005, 04:48 AM

[ QUOTE ]
Believe me, I feel for you, but alcohol isn't going to solve any of this. A lot of people in college don't drink and have a great time. A lot of people in college drink and have a miserable time. They key is finding something you love doing and that makes you happy, and drinking certainly doesn't have to be it.

[/ QUOTE ]

Quoted for truth.

uw_madtown · #9 11-15-2005, 04:46 AM

[ QUOTE ]
I want so badly to fit in, bang normal chicks, have a good time. I plan on rushing in the spring.

I want to live the right college experience...

[/ QUOTE ]

This is pretty much what I meant.

A) There is no "right" college experience.
B) Desperation is not going to make you seem less desperate.

Obviously you need to "try" to change, but it's not something you can do through sheer will, nor by just reading up on women. Like anything else, you need to start low and build experience and confidence. This does not necessarily mean low standards -- it means low expectations.

Trying to do it all at once will not end well. Start out just getting comfortable with drinking, if that's something you want to do. After a couple times doing that in moderation, you should feel comfortable with it. Then start approaching chicks you think are attractive with no intention of taking them home, or even asking for their number. Talk to them planning NOT to try and close.

Once you're comfortable with that, then you can go for numbers, one-nighters, whatever.

Blarg · #10 11-15-2005, 04:48 AM

Enjoy your moderation too. The drinking in frats can be pretty ruinous to people's grades and health. Don't try to fit in so hard you lose your sense of self. Drink to get a different feeling of enjoying who you are, not to cover it up, not to be someone else, and not to conform or please anyone but yourself. It's a lot funnier to laugh at all the guys barfing and pick up on all the chicks than to take yourself out of the party early and get sick as a fool besides.