Funniest Line You Ever SAID at a Poker Table

[Ghazban]

Playing a $60 buyin NL tournament in Vegas, I openraised a couple off the button on a pure steal with J2o. The guy next to me calls (d'oh!) and the flop comes K22. I bet the pot, he calls. Turn is a 2, I check, he bets, I call. River is some irrelevant card, I check, he bets half the pot, I put him all-in and he quickly calls with TT to get busted by my quads.

Very next hand, I'm dealt KK, its folded to me, I raise, and everybody folds. I show the cowboys and say "I can't ALWAYS have jack deuce".

[PokerBob]

Whe someone flops a monster I like to say, "Wow. I never flop a full house. I guess I need more practice."

I am hilarious.

[djoyce003]

Party 5/10, I have ace 2 suited in the blind and see the flop for free.

Flop was AA2, I check, late position bets, I call and get a couple of other callers.

Turn was another ace. I check, late bets again, i sit there for a minute and go " I have an ace, but my kicker sucks" and raise.