THE OFFICIAL 2+2 CHILD ACCOLADES THREAD

[Vehn]

I was the only person in the history of my high school to be a national merit semi finalist (on the basis of my PSAT scores), but not be a finalist. Mostly because in my "give me money" essay I told them not to give me money.

[Zeno]

I was almost held back in the Sixth Grade. My parents stopped the derailment. Details are too numerous to list but spelling and English were two bugaboos.

To illustrate, my father build us kids a combo desk/bookshelves along the wall of our bedroom out of Western Red Cedar. On the wall, under the bookshelves, was a long, long list of verbs and all the proper conjugations, from the familiar to the silly to the obscure. I was to memorize this list or die trying. Instead, I invented a game.

First, you try balancing yourself in a chair using only the back legs and while doing this have a sharp wooden pencil in your hand. As you move forward toward the desk the pencil is use to push back from the desk and rebalance yourself on the back legs of the chair. This is a very difficult procedure and takes hours of practice to master. The pencil lead sinks deep into the soft cedar wood of the desk and leaves a circular impression. Thus you can track your progress (much to the dismay of my father). If you break the pencil or even the lead tip that is minus some points. In addition, you can try to hit the previous circular impressions already imprinted into the desk. This is superb fun, and much more important than verb conjugation.

I did win some ribbons for contests and games held at the end of the school year. This was usually races or other types of physical competitions. This was stopped by about the four or fifth grade, I think (~1964).

-Zeno

[SossMan]

I don't remember winning anything, but I had a ton of CERTIFICATES OF PARTICIPATION.

side note:
Why do people always blame the fat kid when someone farted?

[BeerMoney]

When I was in HS the hottest girl in the school thought I was funny. To this day, she is the best looking woman I've ever seen in my entire life.

[Boris]

this only counts as an accolade if you tickled more than just her funnybone.

[BeerMoney]

[ QUOTE ]
this only counts as an accolade if you tickled more than just her funnybone.

[/ QUOTE ]

I would have rented a billboard and let the whole state know if I did. Just a guy without the guts to make a move.

[Mahoney]

My senior year of high school I was tied for most days tardy. The other "winner" was my buddy that drove.

[Malarky]

[ QUOTE ]
My senior year of high school I was tied for most days tardy. The other "winner" was my buddy that drove.

[/ QUOTE ]

Awesome bro. I had the record for unexcused absences. On two different years.

[gonores]

I was the first and only recipient of a ticket from my town's "Daytime Curfew" law.

[The Dude]

This thread reminds me of one of my favorite bumper stickers:

"Your kid may be an honor student, but you're a fucking moron."