If you use a leaf blower...

[MikeNaked]

...you're a friggin pansy.

For the last 45 minutes, there has been a high-pitch scream emanating from the house next door as my neighbor blows leaves off of his roof. He could've completed the job in the same amount of time with a good old fashioned broom and burned off 100 calories to boot. No wonder his belly's circumference has expanded about 10 inches in the last year.

I usually like to either read or play poker on my laptop outside. No more, now that fall is here. I [censored] hate these machines...