Revenge on neighbors

[vexvelour]

I have this bitch next door (I live in an apt complex) that will call the cops at the drop of a hat. If I close my front door too loud, the cops will be at my door and the next day I'll have a noise complaint. It's getting ridiculous because the walls here are like paper and I deal with noises from other neighbors. It's getting to the point where I'm going to get evicted if I make another sound, and it's [censored] terrible living like this.

I want to get back at her, but I don't know what she drives (otherwise I'd key her car). I had a great idea of getting totally trashed and puking on her doorstep, but she'd probably catch me and (surprise) call the cops.

You guys are awfully gross here on OOT, give me some ideas.

[Eurotrash]

drop a deuce in a paper bag, light it on fire, place on her doorstep. knock on the door and run.

[BoogerFace]

Have sex with her sister. Post pix on OOT.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

I'm pretty sure the only solution is to move out. Before you go, though, be sure to plant something inside the walls that makes some sort of annoying noise at random/opportune times and has incredibly long battery life (unless you want to run wires to power it!). This'll take some wall patching/painting effort, though. Be careful to rig it up so the noise only projects to her apt.

[housenuts]

get a really thin baking sheet with little edges. piss in it, freeze it, and then slide it under her door upside down. it will melt and she'll have piss all over her floor

or, break a key off in her lock

[djoyce003]

cut her up into little pieces and feed her to a dog?

[diebitter]

[ QUOTE ]
get a really thin baking sheet with little edges. piss in it, freeze it, and then slide it under her door upside down. it will melt and she'll have piss all over her floor

[/ QUOTE ]

Plus that means her apartment becomes your property forever.

I used to live in an apartment that had thin walls, and this old couple turned me in for taking showers late at night. One time they waited until 3am or so to knock on my door and leave a nasty note. Pissed me off beyond belief. So I'd like some more information on this bitchy librarian neighbor you have so OOT and I can come up with something original and appropriate (although I do like the post pix idea already stated.)

Is she married or does she have a significant other?
How old is she?
What does she do for a living?
Does she have any roommates?
How much revenge are we talking about here? Merely annoying, epic, or something inbetween?

Anything else you can think of is appreciated. And please don't key her car...I'm sure we can think of something better.

ScottieK

[tdarko]

[ QUOTE ]
but I don't know what she drives (otherwise I'd key her car).

[/ QUOTE ]
i believe you get your ass whooped for somethin' like this.

no need to key her car, thats damaging property. has she [censored] up your property yet? hey, here's a [censored]' splendid mature and adult thing to do, mozy your lazy ass over to her place and talk to her about it. you would be surprised at what this could do.

[Patrick del Poker Grande]

[ QUOTE ]
talk to her about it. you would be surprised at what this could do.

[/ QUOTE ]
BOOOOOOOOOO!!!