Advice On How To Keep Party Tables "Happy"

[imported_The Vibesman]

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I also compliment the fish or flame the TAG.

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Yeah, sometimes I'll take the line of defending the fish's play, or sometimes I'll just get all over the coach, ask him for lessons, after every hand say WOW WHAT A GOOD PLAY!!!, things like that. If I'm tired I'll just be quiet or even leave.

[Reqtech]

No player chat

I first begin by making jokes to try to lighten the mood, when some ass insults one of the fish at my table. (The player insulting the fish is almost always a bad player himself, but slightly better than the one he's insulting)

If the attack continues, I begin attacking the obnoxious player myself, defending the fish, etc, in an attempt to get the jerk to fight with me rather than the fish.

Someone in this thread brought up a good suggestion, though. Next time I think I'll try getting the jerk to attack me by making obvious stupid silly statements, like "He was right to call to the river with pocket 2's, I always win with pocket 2's, they're the luckiest hand" and so on.

[TomBrooks]

Usually the guy making the tirade is a weak player you want to keep at the table, especially when he's steaming, but you don't want him to chase away the other fish either. Usually I'll say nothing at first and hope it stops. If it gets bad, I might make some light comment designed to diffuse the situation a little. Perhaps some comment about the luck of the cards or something.

Today, this guy had me totally pegged as a complete fish, and was ragging on me every hand after I made a move on him and sucked out (to be fair, he was way overplaying his overpair on the big streets; hit my gutshot on the turn, capped turn, rivered a flush, capped river). Even had people agreeing with him. I didn't want this guy to leave, up until that point, he'd played completely predictable ABC poker, and was starting to tilt hard. So I get to play the part of the semi-knowledgeable fish, saying things like, oh, but I had 17% chance to win and you never know what'll happen. Which kept me happy because he dumped off over $100 to me and the other fish, at 2/4, no less.

This post has no point, but it was one of those things I don't get to do very often.

[stuartharris]

When I hit on the river on a reasonable draw and someone flames me, I always say something like "I was feeling lucky." Don't let them think you know what you're doing--plus it drives them nuts to think that your play was based on a "feeling" and that you got paid off.

[bozlax]

I've been known to throw random (incorrect) percentage numbers at the table-coach. This will ALWAYS turn their attention to me. For instance:

"dude, back off...jackassdonkfish just made a great play! he had a 3-flush plus a 3-card straight draw on the flop, so that gives him a 42% chance of making a hand by the river!"

If you're really, really lucky, the table-coach will scurry off to a poker odds website to refute your claim, and stop even paying attention to his hand. Plus, jackassdonkfish thinks he made a good play, because he's already decided that table-coach is a dick so when table-coach comes back with the right number he'll think he's full of crap.

[USDaniels]

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I've been known to throw random (incorrect) percentage numbers at the table-coach.....Plus, jackassdonkfish thinks he made a good play, because he's already decided that table-coach is a dick so when table-coach comes back with the right number he'll think he's full of crap.

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Brilliant. Beautiful in its simplicity.