What to do with my life (need advice bad)?

[lehighguy]

I'm in equity derivatives.

I just don't like IB in general. It's not a product/desk thing.

[Jgents]

Oh. Gosh. Get a blog. [img]/images/graemlins/smile.gif[/img]

Looks like to me you already made your decision and are just looking for reassurances. Go with whatever you decide and stick with it until your nose bleeds (no pun intended).

I'm 25. I'm smart. I'm lazy. I had a rough childhood. I've spent the last 10 years being a pothead, being content, and doing whatever made me "happy" to get over it. Now im behind in life a bit, and not living up to my potential. I have worked mostly odd jobs and sweezed out 2 years of junior college in the mit's of it.

But now i have a choice, Live up to my potential, or float threw life. Im sick of floating, so i quit pot. Im trying not to be as lazy. I'm going back to school. Now im on the "5 year plan" to get my [censored] together by 30. No more being just "happy", i gotta pay my dues. You are not like me. You have paid your dues so far. Obviously, your not the type to float, or just be content and "happy". But your young enough to do both. Have the 5 year plan, but make one that lets you be happy.

Some of us are not lucky enough/worked hard enough to have this option. I suggest taking advantage of it. Working a job you hate, turns you into someone you don't want to be. Not living up to your potental, turns you into someone you don't want to be. You should search for that ideal middle ground. You have always used your brain, and its in your character to always do so. Maybe you should listen to your heart too this time.

Then again, the older people in this forum have more wisdom, when you can see threw there moments of jadedness. I just wanted to throw in the mid 20's slacker prospective, because i haven't seen it posted yet. And thats the oppisite extreme of being a smart kid with potental, who isn't a college grad. and "successful Banker guy" or whatnot.

[DcifrThs]

[ QUOTE ]
I'm in equity derivatives.

I just don't like IB in general. It's not a product/desk thing.

[/ QUOTE ]

well then its time to move on if you're that unhappy.

i doubt you'll have a hard time finding a job that involves any analysis given where you come from. if you dont like that and want to do something totally different and random then it just takes research, developing contacts, and time.

good luck.

EDIT: notice i never say play poker for a living. id think thats the wrong way to go.

Barron

[MaxPower]

It is clear that you are in the wrong profession for you. There are other businesses other than Investment Banking, you know. In these other businesses you will most likely never make the kind of money you can in IB, but you might enjoy your work and your free time. You might meet people there that you like and who are similar to you. You might even find a boss who you like working for. There are also small companies that you can work for, which are very different from the Corporate America you hate. Ultimately, you could be an entrepenuer.

So I think you should just look for work in something else. If you really love video games, I'm sure you can get a job in that industry. You will probably have to start out in a lowly position, but you can work your way up. The excuse that you have no skill is dumb. Either take some classes to get some skills or get an entry level job. You don't need skills to get hired, you learn most of what you need to know on the job)

I don't think you have to worry about the reference thing. You are just out of college, nobody is expecting you to have amazing references. You don't have to use your current employer as a reference.

You are worrying way too much about this. If you are absolutely sure that you want out of your industry, get out. If I were hiring someone who was fresh out of college, I would not label them a quiter if they has worked 3 months at a job they hated. I would respect their choice. I would hire them right away if they were qualified. If any part of you thinks that you want to make Investment Banking your career then don't quit - give it a try for a few years.

There is no going back at this point. The life you knew is gone. The new world you are entering into can be very rewarding in its own way, but it will never be like the old one.

On the issue of hanging out with your friends. I certainly reccommend you do that as much as possible, but you should not base your career decisions on that. I have news for you, in 3-5 years all of your friends (and you) will be in serious relationships and will be getting married and they will have serious careers of their own. Once that happens, you will still see them and hang out occasionaly, but it will not be like it is now. You might even find that some of your friends take a different path and you no longer have much in common with them.

Good Luck.

[2ndGoat]

I was in a similar position a year ago. I ended up quitting my job, which would not have been quite as lucrative as yours (50k out of college, but would taken ~8 years to get to 100 unless I went into consulting), but also wasn't quite as terrible (40 hours weeks, just still hated the corporate atmosphere).

I ended up hopping off the "smart career decision" path and have just played poker for 9 months now. It has been fantastic.

The money has not been what I thought it would be. I figure to make 65k my first 12 months instead of the 200k I honestly projected when I left work. Most of this is due to the fact that I can't seem to make myself play more than 20 hours a week, on average. The rest is because I'm not quite as good at poker as I thought. 65k on my own is just slightly less compensation than the 50k+amazing benefits at my previous job.

Waking up whenever I want and not thinking about facing traffic has made me happier than I could imagine (and I imagined it would make me pretty damn happy). Being able to fly wherever, whenever, and do so on one-way tickets with no definite return plan is also really nice. Dealing with 15k downswings with no paycheck backing me up (I've had 2) has made me a little more frustrated than I imagined (and I imagined it wouldn't really frustrate me THAT much). And to be honest, it's pretty fun to answer the "what do you do?" question now- whether the questioner responds with envy or looks at me like I'm delusional. The 20 hour a week job is pretty nice too. I haven't necessarily spent the extra time on productive activities (often video games and such) but sometimes I have.

The real benefit? Getting away from the world where I always had the next step (that is, the next carrot) laid out before me has given me time to figure what I think I actually want to do. I didn't plan on that. Over these past 9 months I've determined I want to be a teacher. Eventually. I'll still likely take another year or two off of life because it's a pretty good time. The other great thing is I know I can support myself with poker, so even if teaching doesn't pay anything, I can help support myself with 2 months of poker in the summer (assuming I teach high school) and part time play during the year.

Part of this comes from seeing how close "the money" is. If I *did* force myself to work more hours, and take the game more seriously, I still think I could get to the 200k mark within a year or two- at 24/25. I also see my buddy, the phenom, make 6 figures on a TV show, or close to it in a 48 hour span at a cash game, at the age of 22. It's rather absurd- almost like a cheat code for life. I never thought money was a huge deal, but I've realized even more how little it really means to me now. Sure it would be nice to have "ftw" money, but I really would like to do something where I feel like I'm making a positive impact on the world, AND like what I do, and it seems more important than the cash.

Hope that has helped you some. While the decision is obviously one only you can make, it seems real obvious to get the hell off wall street if it's going to steal your soul. Also, I highly recommend "What Should I Do With My Life?" by Po Bronson. He interviewed a thousand or so people and put maybe 30 of their career stories into a book. Has lots of investment types in it.

2nd

[phish]

I think it's clear you need to get out of your current job. I think you should look for another job. Don't worry about references. Most employers ask if they can contact your current employer. Just say no and they won't contact until after they've made an offer and you've accepted.

I don't think you've proven yourself as a successful enough poker player yet, so I wouldn't plan to go 'pro'. Would be okay to quit and just play for a few months or so, but don't count on it yet as a lifetime employment.

But if your job is causing you physical problems, then there's no argument for staying there any longer. Forget the contract you've signed and the bonuses, etc. It ain't worth it.

FWIW - I've been through a few similar situations in my life and am considering another--quitting a boring computer programming job to work freelance and play a lot more poker. But to put your situation in terms this board can relate to: I think if you add up the eV of hanging around for your bonus + eV of putting in enough time to not look like a complete flake should you ever decide to step in these waters again + eV of seeing something through enough to know 100% for sure it's not for you (2 months in a job is almost never sufficient) = no-brainer. I think every job I've ever had has gone through a low point somewhere between 6 and 18 months, but after that it usually gets better.

Poker's calling me too. But I know giving up my (however boring) 6-figure job would just be stupid at this point. Having said that, don't waste your life if you KNOW IB is something you hate. But make sure you think things through and make damn sure you really feel that way before you throw away this opportunity. And don't confuse wanting to sleep in, set your own hours and play a game for a living with following a passion. Everyone wants the former, passion needs to be combined with hard work and commitment if you're ever going to accomplish something great. Nothing worth doing in life is ever easy. Think about where you want to go with poker. And if it's just so you can set your own hours, etc., think about where 5,10,20 years of that is going to leave you. I think that person winds up as shallow as the coworkers you can't stand.

[NorthernGuy]

[ QUOTE ]
I love games. A conservative estimate of how much warcraft i played would be 4 hours a day everyday for 3 years.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think this shows the lack of maturity and grip on reality. I'm amazed you finished a degree, playing games that much.

A couple months at a job isn't enough to determine anything. You hacked it through school, I think you should at least stick it out for a while at the job and not rush into any decision. If you want to get into gaming, then investigate what it would take... maybe back to school for a bit for programming.

Look around at other opportunities relating to Finance. I'm in that field also, and I know there's crappy jobs out there, but there are plenty of great ones out there. Are you wanting to stay in NYC? What about moving to a smaller city with lower cost of living?

You should at least have some thought towards the future, more than "get drunk and play games." Someday you may actually want to buy a house, car, cottage... get married, have kids... etc.

Well, I don't know that you should play poker (but if it is your passion, I don't see why not), but clearly, you don't seem to be on the right path (for you) right now. Life is too short - live it.