Homeless Antics

[dizong]

[ QUOTE ]
was in downtown dallas about 3 years ago and we were leaving a bar and this homeless man comes up to me asking me for money, i tell him "no" and my friends and i kept walking.

he followed us and starts telling us he will wash my windows and crap and how he was a marine and goes on and on and we are basically just doing our best to ignore him. he then says, "i will do pushups for money!" i started laughing and drunkingly agreed.

so my friends and i watch him do pushups on a sidewalk in deep ellum (dallas). the deal was he gets 10 bucks for every hundred pushups. we were there all night, that scrawny homeless guy did hundreds of pushups and before he was done he had a crowd around him watching him.

he made a hundred bucks off us, we then watched him walk into the liquor store and buy $100 worth of booze and sit right back down on the trash bag where he was when came up to us.

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you got pwn3d by a homeless guy lol

dizong

[RRRRICK]

[ QUOTE ]
I think I have the best homeless person story. Well, not best, but I certainly top most people's stories when this topic gets going.

I was living in SF and had just bought my lunch from Sliders[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] on Polk. I lived kinda in the Tenderloin so I was walking home and I passed a homeless shelter along the way. It was across the street.

This homeless lady comes running towards me in a really odd way and shes grabbing at her skirt and screaming unintelligible stuff. She stops like maybe 3 feet away from me at the curb. She turns around, still screaming, and bends over. She flips her skirt over her back and exposes to me that she's not wearing any underwear.

So as you can guess a homeless lady's private region isn't the best thing to look at before eating lunch since it had lots of discolored skin and sores and I won't go on about that. Anyway, if that wasn't bad enough, she starts to shoot projectile diarrhea like a fountain onto the sidewalk, all the while still screaming. When I say fountain I mean it, it was like a stream of browness. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

At that point I think I was in shock because it felt like I had been watching for hours but I'm sure it was only a few seconds. I threw my lunch into the trash went home and curled up into the fetal position for a few hours.

[/ QUOTE ]

I just ate breakfast [img]/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

[Joshssj4]

[ QUOTE ]
I think I have the best homeless person story. Well, not best, but I certainly top most people's stories when this topic gets going.

I was living in SF and had just bought my lunch from Sliders[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] on Polk. I lived kinda in the Tenderloin so I was walking home and I passed a homeless shelter along the way. It was across the street.

This homeless lady comes running towards me in a really odd way and shes grabbing at her skirt and screaming unintelligible stuff. She stops like maybe 3 feet away from me at the curb. She turns around, still screaming, and bends over. She flips her skirt over her back and exposes to me that she's not wearing any underwear.

So as you can guess a homeless lady's private region isn't the best thing to look at before eating lunch since it had lots of discolored skin and sores and I won't go on about that. Anyway, if that wasn't bad enough, she starts to shoot projectile diarrhea like a fountain onto the sidewalk, all the while still screaming. When I say fountain I mean it, it was like a stream of browness. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

At that point I think I was in shock because it felt like I had been watching for hours but I'm sure it was only a few seconds. I threw my lunch into the trash went home and curled up into the fetal position for a few hours.

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Slowly curling up into the fetal position as well. [img]/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]

[Klepton]

i'm still laughing.

[Eurotrash]

[ QUOTE ]
I think I have the best homeless person story. Well, not best, but I certainly top most people's stories when this topic gets going.

I was living in SF and had just bought my lunch from Sliders[img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img] on Polk. I lived kinda in the Tenderloin so I was walking home and I passed a homeless shelter along the way. It was across the street.

This homeless lady comes running towards me in a really odd way and shes grabbing at her skirt and screaming unintelligible stuff. She stops like maybe 3 feet away from me at the curb. She turns around, still screaming, and bends over. She flips her skirt over her back and exposes to me that she's not wearing any underwear.

So as you can guess a homeless lady's private region isn't the best thing to look at before eating lunch since it had lots of discolored skin and sores and I won't go on about that. Anyway, if that wasn't bad enough, she starts to shoot projectile diarrhea like a fountain onto the sidewalk, all the while still screaming. When I say fountain I mean it, it was like a stream of browness. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

At that point I think I was in shock because it felt like I had been watching for hours but I'm sure it was only a few seconds. I threw my lunch into the trash went home and curled up into the fetal position for a few hours.

[/ QUOTE ]


TUBGIRL, the ride


edit: [censored], i feel traumatized just having read the story

[sublime]

debaucherous

can of checken soup.