What do you say to Hellmuth?

[Nick709]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'd ask him who he is.

[/ QUOTE ]
follow up:
You're not Phil Hellmuth. Phil Hellmuth is seven feet tall.

[/ QUOTE ]

Or follow up with: " That can't be Phil Hellmuth, for I am prettier than this man!"

[zaxx19]

"Sam Grizzle kicked your ass....Sam Friggun Grizzle..."

[villafan]

I would call him Paul and say: "Even though you got very rich in the IT industry and have learned a lot of poker, you don't need to be a jerk".

[Zetack]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I'd ask him who he is.

[/ QUOTE ]
nh

[/ QUOTE ]

Then ask him if he's been playing poker very long.

If he, or anybody else, mentions that he's a wsop winner, pretend you think they're joking. No matter how insistent anybody gets, keep laughing and shaking your head--"you wiseacres!"


--Zetack

[mackthefork]

[ QUOTE ]
You're playing in the ME at a table with Hellmuth. He criticizes your play and calls you a donkey. What do you do/say?

[/ QUOTE ]

Alright man?

or possibly

Alright man!

Regards Mack

[LSUfan1]

[ QUOTE ]
"Sam Grizzle kicked your ass....Sam Friggun Grizzle..."

[/ QUOTE ]

This one I really like. You could also go with something like, "Look out Phil, I think Sam Grizzle is coming after you again. Hurry up...Fetal position!"

[PokerBob]

"I play bad."

[kiddj]

Tell him: "You sound just like my voices."

[MicroBob]

[ QUOTE ]
Then ask him if he's been playing poker very long.

If he, or anybody else, mentions that he's a wsop winner, pretend you think they're joking. No matter how insistent anybody gets, keep laughing and shaking your head

[/ QUOTE ]


I think this is the winner.
I'd keep yappping at him over his head-phones.


My original instinct was to pull out my standard "I like tacos" line that I reserve for the idiot table-coaches on party poker. It still might be incpororated into my strategy somehow. Maybe even a combination of pretending like you have no clue who this guy is AND talking endlessly about tacos.


I think this whole nonsensical dialogue about Mexican food could be so confusing to Phil that it would have to be +EV.

"King-Jack?? Wow....how could you even play that?? I can't believe you would play like that but I guess that's what happens in the main-event with all these bad players??"

"I like tacos. Do you know what I mean?"

"Ummm...what?? I'm talking about how badly you played that hand and how a 9-bracelet winner like me just has to deal with really bad play like that."


"Yeah...I know....but geez...when they put too much sour-cream on my tacos I'm like 'How can you expect me to enjoy my taco with that much sour-cream?'. Know what I mean?"

turn to guy next to Phil, "I really have thought about writing to them about this. Because it's just stupid for them to ruin my tacos in this way. There was this one place in Florida I went to that didn't do this..." (turn back to Phil)
"And they had GREAT taco-specials. It was 49-cent tacos on Wednesdays and they were REALLY good. The regular price was 74-cents a taco so you're saving 25-cents per taco. Now if I have 4 tacos each Wednesday then I'm saving $52 a year doing this. You might not think it's a lot....but if someone gave you a coupon that said that you save $52 on tacos you would be all like 'Wow. That's not even possible dude.' Seriously...you wouldn't even believe you could save that much on tacos. But if you just get the 4 tacos each Wednesday you really ARE saving that much on tacos. Has anyone tried the Del Taco restaurant out here in Vegas. I saw a sign for it and it looks good but we don't have thm back where I'm from....."



I would keep talking and talking at Phil about tacos until his head exploded.
Trust me on this one....I would be VERY good at doing this.

[Your Mom]

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]

Trust me on this one....I would be VERY good at doing this.

[/ QUOTE ]

I don't think anyone doubts this after your post.