Post your best hammered casino poker story here

[swede123]

In an effort to salvage the thread, here's a story about an encounter with a hammered fella, even though i was fairly sober.

So I'm in Vegas this past summer for my brother-in-law's bachelor party weekend. Since the bachelor and his buddies are all in college they went the ghetto route and we stayed at the Fitzgerald downtown.

So we get up one morning, walking down to the gaming floor of the Fitzgerald. Lot of the guys I was with were not very seasoned in casino stuff, so I was acting the tour guide, showing them the different games and so forth.

As we're going around looking at the different table games we observe this guy, probably in his late 40s, drunk off his ass and playing four hands of BJ at a time. He notices us and invites us to sit down, and a few of us do. In the next few minutes he manages to spill his drink twice on the felt and he's promptly escorted out of the casino.

Now fastforward about two hours. The other guys were all going to the strip for sightseeing and such, and I thought I'd take a stab at some downtown poker. I walk to Binions and get in a 4/8 kill game. After a few minutes guess who is returning from the restroom and sitting down next to me? Yup, drunk guy from Fitzgeralds.

So, this guy is completely out of control. He keeps his huge stack of chips, most of which are not from the Horseshoe, his credit cards and everything else in front of him on the table. Each time he acts he just pushes a large quantity of chips in front of him, making the dealer sort out the correct amount for a call or raise or whatever.

Over the next hours or so the guy loses hundreds, and he's continuing to order a shot and a beer every five minutes. On dealer decides to break him of his strategy of pushing a bunch of chips in front of him. The dealer explains to the guy how the betting structure is and informs him that any amount in excess of the bet will be considered a tip and he (the dealer) will pocket it. Next time drunk guy does this the dealer calmly puts the 8 for the raise in the pot, and pockets the 30 or 40 remaining bucks. After the second time the dealer does this drunk guy straightens out a little bit.

Throughout all this everyone pretty much puts up with the guy, since he's donating generously to everyone. He's tipping the dealers green chips liberally so they overlook his behavior as well.

Eventually drunk guy reaches over and grabs my hand after I win a big pot. I laugh at him, shake his hand and tell him to not touch me. A few minutes later the guy once again grabs my hand and this time I pull it away and tell him to not touch me again. Of course he pulls this crap again, and this time I give him a good shove, sending him crashing to the floor. The guy is laying on the floor laughing, which was a nice reaction. I was half expecting to have to defend myself. At this point the floor and security arrives, the dealer explains the situation and drunk guy is escorted out of the facilities, no doubt going for the next casino down Fremont Street.

The rest of the Bachelor weekend reached a high point when the groom, his dad (my father in law), myself and the rest of the gang went to the Glitter Gulch. Let me tell you guys something - nothing helps with the bonding like watching skanky strippers with your father in law. The classic moment would be when one cute little stripper compliments my father in law on his suspenders, to which he responds by looking her up and down before saying "I like your outfit as well."

Swede

[Riverman]

Ok, so this one comes to you from the Borgata and it involves a hot cocktail waitress. After playing seriously all day a good friend and I decide to play 2-4 and get hammered. Pretty standard so far.

We buy in for the obligatory 3-5 racks of white each and fire up the game. When the cocktail waitress (Trish for those who frequent the borgata) comes around the first time we tell her to keep them coming and give her a handfull of whites each. Now I realize that all the waitresses there are hot, but this chick is absolutely smoking, arguably the hottest one there. She's getting us good and drunk and we are hitting on her like the drunk degenerate sleazes that we are. I assume shes playing along only because we are tipping obscenely, but eventually she brings our drinks over and asks what we are doing after poker. We sort of do a double take and say something like "taking you up to the BBar" etc. She says to meet her there at 4 she is going there with another waitress. So obviously we go, I cant do anything because I have a serious gf but my buddy is pumped. The friend turns out to be somewhat ugly and I occupy her while my buddy runs his game on the hot waitress. At some point (I was beyond wasted) they disappear. The end of this story is a letdown as he later told me that it wasnt that great once they got upstairs, but let it be an inspirational tale illustrating the possibility of hooking up with one of those hotties...

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After I turned 21 my mom wanted to go to Vegas. She was very lonely and sad after a divorce with my dad and worked constantly so I thought I would go with her to give her some company. At Bally's the bar is right next to the poker section and they keep brining you drink after drink after dirnk..... You get the point. I got like four vodka Red Bulls in the time it took to go one orbit around the table. Anyways I was playing 3/6 and was SUPER hammered after about two hours. I was raising and capping every street with anything. By the end of the night I was stuck about $600 for being so hammered and just [censored] totally around. The next day when we were going to the airport my mom tells me she won about $700 on a lucky slot pull. I told her about my poker losses and she said "I had so much fun, heres the money you lost! I know going to Vegas with your mom is kind of lame so this is to show how much it meant to me!" Woohoo!

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I think I played with you. Remember that hand where you folded AK on the river all pissed off? I had AJ.

[MrBrightside]

ok, my drunken vegas story. This was just last month when my wife surprised me with a trip for my birthday. Now, I played a little poker (got 2nd in a $100 plaza midnight tourney), but this was mainly time with the wife, and we play cheap blackjack and get ripped.

We had a hard time finding $3 blackjack, even downtown, but finally found a new dive: The Golden Gate. Hung out there every nite.

One dude was Ray, from San Diego. Great guy (we get to know everybody). Best dealer was deaf jeff. He rocked. Anyway, we did horrible at blackjack, but Ray was a star. He won every nite, the pit loved him (they liked us to). Anway, this guy only drank catpain morgan and coke. The last nite, frustrated at losing again (i don't mind losing, but give me ONE winning session on a trip, that's all I ask), with Ray winning again, and I'm already hammered. I have like $50 gambling money left for the day, and I said "screw it, bring me a captain and coke. Ray, I am merely a sprout in the shadow of your greatness" or some such crap.

I proceed to have about 11 captain and cokes and win $350. Also, I decided on this instance, that I would NEVER hit a 16 again. It was just pissing me off to bust and the % edge you gain is tiny, so I just stopped doing it. Every time I would win and hand and my wife (who was still losing) would glare at me, I would click my glass with Ray and loudly declare "it's all about the captain". Plus, they were damn tasty.

To top it all off, I had the hangover to end all hangover's the next day and we get up early to get to McCarran only to find our flight has been delayed SIX HOURS. Forgetting to call and check was my bad beat for the trip....

[idrinkcoors]

I can't top any of these stories. I've never woke up with 3k in my pocket....more like I woke up with 20 atm receipts in my pocket, and one "TRANSACTION DECLINED" recipt.

Anyway, I drink lots, but my buddy makes me look like a Mormom bishop. On one trip to Blackhawk, CO. we are drinking like fish and playing high limit BJ. ($5.00) In this game though, if you get dealt three cards in a row of the same denomination (three sevens, or three queens for example), the dealer turns over this hourglass, and the table has 5 minutes where every dealer card is exposed up front. So the dealer shows her 19 and my drunken buddy stands on his 18.

Another time in Mesquite, he is splashing chips all over the craps table, and throws 2 green chips on the felt and says, "Two way hard five." Of course from now on his name isn't Mark. It's "Hard Five."

[cnfuzzd]

i so win.

epeace

john nickle

I once had AK and raised pre-flop, and the flop totally missed me!!!!11

[hfrog355]

Nothing good from me because the closest casino to Ft. Worth is Winstar...an 18+, no alcohol casino with not much in the way of waitresses. Sad, I know.

Anyway, I've got finals this week and am absolutely loving this discussion. Please keep these stories coming as they are all that is sustaining my sanity.

P.S. Are any of you accountants? How do you live with yourselves?

[Kyo Souma II]

turning stone 3/6 lhe. some fat ho spilled my last bottle of celebrator on my nice blue jeans.

that pissed me off.

[MCS]

[ QUOTE ]
In this game though, if you get dealt three cards in a row of the same denomination (three sevens, or three queens for example), the dealer turns over this hourglass, and the table has 5 minutes where every dealer card is exposed up front.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wow. I got all excited about exploiting this and making tons of cash, and then I realized they can just ban you if they want. Or at the very least limit your bet.