favourite movie rants

[HoldingFolding]

[Gal is sunbathing by poolside]
Oh, yeah. Bloody hell. I'm sweating in here. Roasting. Boiling. Baking. Sweltering. It's like a sauna. Furnace. You can fry an egg on my stomach. Ohh, who wouldn't lap this up? It's ridiculous. Tremendous. Fantastic. Fan-dabby-dozy-tastic. People say, "Don't you miss it, Gal?" I say, "What, England? Nah. [censored] place. It's a dump. Don't make me laugh. Grey, grimy, sooty. What a [censored] hole. What a toilet. Every [censored] with a long face shuffling about, moaning, all worried. No thanks, not for me." They say, "What's it like, then, Spain?" And I'll say, "It's hot. Hot. Oh, it's [censored] hot. Too hot? Not for me, I love it."

Juxtaposed with:

Shut up, [censored]. You louse. You got some [censored]' neck ain't you. Retired? [censored] off, you're revolting. Look at your suntan, it's leather, it's like leather man, your skin. We could make a [censored] suitcase out of you. Like a crocodile, fat crocodile, fat bastard. You look like [censored] Idi Amin, you know what I mean? Stay here? You should be ashamed of yourself. Who do you think you are? King of the castle? Cock of the walk?
[He gut-punches Gal]
Don: What you think this is the wheel of fortune? You think you can make your dough and [censored] off? Leave the table? Thanks Don, see you Don, off to sunny Spain now Don, [censored] off Don. Lying in your pool like a fat blob laughing at me, you think I'm gonna have that? You really think I'm gonna have that, ya ponce. All right, I'll make it easy for you. God knows you're [censored] trying. Are you gonna do the job? It's not a difficult question, are you gonna do the job, yes or no?

[HoldingFolding]

One more for the rodeo:

Ray: She took his dinner in to him once. Me mum, in the pub, and plonked it in front of him on a tray. Knife and fork, salt and pepper. He said, "What's that?" She said, "It's your dinner. I thought you might be hungry. You ain't eaten for three [censored] days. You live in here, you might as well [censored] eat in here." It's funny. He didn't like that, did he? Mugged him up in front of his mates. Thought more of them [censored] than he did us. Lovely. Yeah. She got a clump over that. Well, she would, wouldn't she? He was always pissed in there, weren't he? You know? We go in the pub to get our living, you know? That's where we do our business. He'd be there spunking out while we're sitting at home without a dinar, you know, thank you. And he'd promise things. You know? Promise to take us places, you know? Never did. Never took us anywhere. And when he did bother to come home he'd sit in that [censored] chair, doss off with his tray in his lap. And I'd just stand there looking at him. I'd look in his face, and my mother'd go upstairs, and I'd say, "Say, Mum, ain't Daddy coming to bed?" And she'd say, "No. No, he's all right, son. He'll come up when he wakes up." He's gotta wake up to go to bed! Now, I'd stand there looking at this [censored] old man, you know, my dad, you know, in that chair, that horrible [censored] chair with the shiny, worn-out arms. I should've burnt the [censored] thing. By the end he was hemorrhaging from both ends, you know? I used to hear him in the morning hanging on to the kharzi. It was lovely. Never stopped him going to the pub, though. No, he was well enough to do that. Now, one day, right, he's staggering across the pub pissed from the night before. He's gone over, crunch, right on his mooey, like a [censored] ironing board. His hooter's around here, his railings all over the [censored] place. Me and me mum had to go the hospital to see him. We walked in. He's laying in bed. He's got tubes up his arms, [censored] up his nose, down the back of his Gregory. He didn't look well. [censored] vodka was keeping him alive. Well, I ain't that interested, so I'm having a little mooch about, you know. I looked above his bed, and there's this sign, right, with some weird writing on it. I couldn't read too well at the time. I said to my mum, "Mum, what's that say? You know, that sign above Daddy's head." All right? She said, "Nil by mouth." "What's that, a football score?" One-nil, three-nil, two-nil, a geezer called [censored] Nil. Yeah. I said, "Well, what's it mean?" She said, "It means..."
Mark: It means nothing to eat.
Ray: Yeah, nothing down the...
[points into his mouth]
Mark: Nothing down the... Yeah.
Ray: Yeah, all right. I remembered that day, because I could've put that on his [censored] tombstone, you know? Because I don't remember one kiss, you know, one cuddle. Nothing. I mean, plenty went down, not a lot came out, you know, nothing that was any [censored] good. And I'd look at this man that I call Dad, you know? My father, I knew him as Dad. He was my [censored] dad but he weren't like other kids' dads, you know? It was as if the word itself were enough, and it ain't.
Mark: That ain't when he died though, is it?
Ray: No. He lived another ten years, slippery old [censored]. He died one afternoon in that [censored] armchair. About right. I went around to see him, you know, when he was plotted up at me mother's.
Mark: Hatcham Road?
Ray: Yeah, Hatcham Road. He was upstairs in that front bedroom. Laid out.
Mark: Free.
Ray: Yeah. Yeah. I've gone up there, gone in. I'm sitting on the bed looking at him. He's laying there like... Mullered. And it was like he'd shrunk, you know? He was a big man.
Mark: He was a lump.
Ray: Yeah. You should know. You got enough clumps off the [censored]. (sighs) And I just touched him, you know? He was [censored] freezing cold. It frightened the life out of me. I was looking at him, you know? For the first time in my life, I talked to him. I said, "Why didn't you ever love me?"

[jba]

a couple more


[ QUOTE ]
"Of course that's your contention. You're a first year grad student. You just got finished readin' some Marxian historian -- Pete Garrison probably. You're gonna be convinced of that 'til next month when you get to James Lemon, and then you're gonna be talkin' about how the economies of Virginia and Pennsylvania were entrepreneurial and capitalist way back in 1740. That's gonna last until next year -- you're gonna be in here regurgitating Gordon Wood, talkin' about, you know, the Pre-revolutionary utopia and the capital-forming effects of military mobilization... Wood drastically -- Wood drastically underestimates the impact of social distinctions predicated upon wealth, especially inherited wealth.' You got that from Vickers, 'Work in Essex County,' page 98, right? Yeah, I read that too. Were you gonna plagiarize the whole thing for us? Do you have any thoughts of your own on this matter? Or do you...is that your thing? You come into a bar. You read some obscure passage and then pretend...you pawn it off as your own idea just to impress some girls and embarrass my friend? See, the sad thing about a guy like you is in 50 years you're gonna start doin' some thinkin' on your own and you're gonna come up with the fact that there are two certainties in life. One: don't do that. And two: You dropped a hundred and fifty grand on a f----n' education you coulda' got for a dollar fifty in late charges at the public library.

[/ QUOTE ]



#2:

[ QUOTE ]

"How To Fake Like You Are Nice and Caring."
This is...obviously...quite an important
section...I mean, let's face it...face the
facts...Men Are [censored], right? I mean,
that is what they all say. We've all done
bad things...bad things that no woman
has ever done...that's what they say.
We As Men are taught to apologize: "I've done wrong."
"I'm sorry." "My needs as a man made me..."
Something, something...[censored]....well what
I would like to say....
If you feel, made to feel like you need
them, like -- like you can't live if
you're without them or you need, what?
They're pussy? They're love? [censored] that.
Self Sufficient, gents. That's the truth.
What you are -- we are -- you need them
for what? To [censored] make you a piece of
snot rag? A puppett? huh? Hear them
bitch and moan? bitch and moan --
and we're taught one thing -- go the other
way -- there is No Excuse I will give you,
I'm not gonna apologize -- I'm not gonna
apologize for my NEED my DESIRE...my, the
things that I need as a man to feel comfortable...
You understand? You understand? You need
to say something, "my mommy hit me or
daddy hit me or didn't let me play soccer,
so now I make mistakes, cause a that -- something,
so now I piss and [censored] on it and do this."
[censored]. I'm sorry. ok. yeah. no. [censored].
go. [censored]. alright. go make a new mistake.
maybe not, I dunno...[censored]....

[/ QUOTE ]

[ilya]

[ QUOTE ]
[Gal is sunbathing by poolside]
Oh, yeah. Bloody hell. I'm sweating in here. Roasting. Boiling. Baking. Sweltering. It's like a sauna. Furnace. You can fry an egg on my stomach. Ohh, who wouldn't lap this up? It's ridiculous. Tremendous. Fantastic. Fan-dabby-dozy-tastic. People say, "Don't you miss it, Gal?" I say, "What, England? Nah. [censored] place. It's a dump. Don't make me laugh. Grey, grimy, sooty. What a [censored] hole. What a toilet. Every [censored] with a long face shuffling about, moaning, all worried. No thanks, not for me." They say, "What's it like, then, Spain?" And I'll say, "It's hot. Hot. Oh, it's [censored] hot. Too hot? Not for me, I love it."

Juxtaposed with:

Shut up, [censored]. You louse. You got some [censored]' neck ain't you. Retired? [censored] off, you're revolting. Look at your suntan, it's leather, it's like leather man, your skin. We could make a [censored] suitcase out of you. Like a crocodile, fat crocodile, fat bastard. You look like [censored] Idi Amin, you know what I mean? Stay here? You should be ashamed of yourself. Who do you think you are? King of the castle? Cock of the walk?
[He gut-punches Gal]
Don: What you think this is the wheel of fortune? You think you can make your dough and [censored] off? Leave the table? Thanks Don, see you Don, off to sunny Spain now Don, [censored] off Don. Lying in your pool like a fat blob laughing at me, you think I'm gonna have that? You really think I'm gonna have that, ya ponce. All right, I'll make it easy for you. God knows you're [censored] trying. Are you gonna do the job? It's not a difficult question, are you gonna do the job, yes or no?

[/ QUOTE ]

Great movie. The whole intro/credits sequence is gold.