I Still Can't Do It : 77 UTG

[GuyOnTilt]

I still can't do it. I still can't play perfect poker. And I don't mean that I still make mistakes, 'cause I know I'll always do that and I'm okay with that. The idea is to take the time, do the math work, and try to spot the mistakes so I can put an end to them, so I can become the player I want to be. No, that's not what I mean at all. It's doing things like this, where I know exactly what the right play is, but do something different anyway like a complete dumbass. That's what the fish can't stop doing. That's what the typical tight-playing mid-stakes playeres can't stop doing. But not me, for I can rise above all that [censored]. Can't I?

A great 80 game yesterday at Bay 101. There're two walkers right now and we're 8-handed and I'm playing well. No, I'm playing VERY well. My head is clear, I'm making great decisions. At least until this hand.

I'm dealt 7 [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]7 [img]/images/graemlins/diamond.gif[/img] UTG and raise. I've been doing a lot of opening in the past few hours and some of the players are starting to notice. I'm not getting isolated weakly or liberally, but I'm getting calls from the blinds HU with some really weak holdings.

Anyway, UTG+1 is one of the three spots at the table who is too tight PF, but good and thinks well postflop. He hesitates and cold-calls, which a first for the session. Immediate thoughts were 44-88, AJs, KQs, maybe AA/KK/99. Could be slightly wider, but not by much if any. Next to act is a floorperson who's way too loose PF but not overly aggro, too loose and aggressive on the flop, and typical loose fish on the turn and river. He 3-bets in rhythm and it's folded to a fishy fish Button who calls. SB folds, loose'ish BB calls, I call, UTG+1 calls. There goes AA/KK.

5 to the flop for 15 SB's.

Flop comes: 6 [img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]5 [img]/images/graemlins/heart.gif[/img]4 [img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]

Checked to the floorperson who bets, Button does what he does and calls, BB folds. I call, UTG+1 check-raises. NH sir. Now the floorperson just calls, Button calls, I call. 4 to the turn for 11.75 BB's.

Turn comes: 5 [img]/images/graemlins/spade.gif[/img]

I check, UTG+1 bets, floor calls, Button calls. Now as soon as I checked my brain started doing the usual turn math calcs, and by the time it was bet and called back to me I knew what my action should be. So I go to slide to the chip off my cards and flick them toward the dealer, but my body doesn't do it. Instead, I find myself rethinking the math and trying to find a way where I can be justified in calling here.

I think about my implied odds and try to tell myself that they greatly outweigh my reverse implied odds. I try to tell myself that I don't want these chips going into a too-tight player's stack, and certainly not one on my immediate left. I try recalcing the math and trying to weight things so that I can tell myself a call is good here, that I can make money with a call. I try, but I'm not fooling anybody. I know this is a losing call. And I as I tell myself that, my hand reaches out and cuts off two stacks of four.

I thought about this hand a lot last night. I've thought about it a lot this morning. I [censored] hate myself for being so [censored] weak-minded and not being able to take the action that I know is best, just because I can't get over the bullshit mantras about big pots and strong draws, or big pots and top pairs, or whatever. I know I know how to play this game, and I know I could be a good player -IF- I would only let myself get beyond all the bullshit. I'm hoping this post will help me in that regard. Thanks for listening.

GoT