Do we buy him an ass wiper? (seriously)

[edfurlong]

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Show him this thread.

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Or even show him the thread from a few months ago about being a back-side ass wiper or a front-side nut sack lifting wiper and ask him which one he is?

Big Steve [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

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People wipe from the front? [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

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as far as i know, all women wipe front to back. and apparantly some men.

Barron

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I was unclear but I meant front as in "lift your balls stick your hand between your legs".

[youtalkfunny]

Trust me, it's not his size that's keeping him from wiping. He just doesn't know/care about hygiene.

Every army unit has a guy like this. The problem is usually solved when his buddies drag him into the shower, and give him the wire brush treatment. After one of those, the subject will usually start to pay attention to his hygiene.

[MMMMMM]

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Years at work taking dumps in the stalls have made it clear to me that very little and very hasty wiping is common among men, of every social class too. Not washing one's hands is likewise very common among men.

Men in general are pretty much sissies when it comes to cleaning things, including their own asses and hands.

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It is almost unbelievable to me that people like this even exist. I mean how can they stand it. Doesn't their skin itch and crawl terribly? How can anyone have such insensitive skin, not to mention unsanitary personal hygiene.

[Blarg]

Amazes me too. I can't even count the times I've heard guys reel off huge lengths of toilet paper, crumple it into a ball, and rub the thing around for a few seconds before practically sprinting out of the stall. No way they got their asses clean like that. The "big protective toilet paper ball" theory of ass wiping is ridiculous.

And the number of guys who run out of the stall and then out the door without washing is insane. A guy where I used to work told me about someone they named The Phantom Sh]tter who would dash out of the stall while people were at the urinal and sprint out the door before anyone could see who it was who was not washing his hands. The Phantom Sh]tter strikes again!

The mental image of this scene is hilarious

[MelK]

There are billions of animals out there that never wipe their asses. If it itches they may rub it against the ground.

Face it, you just live with an animal, and he smells like a barn.

[GoblinMason (Craig)]

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Show him this thread.

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Or even show him the thread from a few months ago about being a back-side ass wiper or a front-side nut sack lifting wiper and ask him which one he is?

Big Steve [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

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People wipe from the back? [img]/images/graemlins/confused.gif[/img]

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[tonypaladino]

Anyone who can sit on a toilet can wipe themselves. Just slip an anonymous note into his room.

[Paluka]

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Boss: Do you dump wherever you're standing, or do you use toilets? Or, do you use some magical Centaur toilet?

Centaur: We use regular bathrooms.

Boss: Do you use special Centaur toilet paper?

Centaur: Nope. We use nortmal toilet paper.

Boss: How do you reach back there.. to wipe yourself?

Centaur: Uh.. there is a device we use, it's called an Aubesian - it's a stainless steel telescoping rod, with gripper claws, and a sort of toggle line that allows you to move the paper back and forth.

Boss: So.. there's a company that manufactures Centaur asswipers?

Centaur: Aubesians, yes. Um.. there's a store that's a sort of crate-and-barrel for Centaurs, called Aubesians & Such.. there's one on 57th Street.

Boss: I've seen that establishment.

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What is the centaur thing from, because I find it pleasing.

[miajag81]

PM me his e-mail and I'll anonymously send him a link to this thread.