Older Women

[LearnedfromTV]

Don't post much here but this one's in my wheelhouse. I'm 25, my girlfriend of over a year is 30 (but looks about my age. She gets carded more than I do). Second time I've dated an older woman (21/27), though this one is much more serious.

If you're into this for sex, my experience is that the stereotype is true. Knock yourself out, but bring it, or don't be surprised if she gets tired of you.

If it gets serious, there are plusses and minuses. For me, way more plusses, but you may be different. My girl is one of the smartest I've ever known, and is very successful. I have more to talk about with her than the average girl my age or younger, and some of that has to do with age/experience. We have similar life goals. (She also digs the game we shall not mention.) The flip side is that there's no denying I'm an adult now. The biological clock is real, even if she doesn't want it to be, there's a built-in family-making horizon that you have to deal with.

You asked what you'd expect out of an older women before you'd date her (I assume you mean date seriously when you ask this). Don't think of it that way, just find out if you enjoy being with her. The only thing I'd "expect" is that she has done something worthwhile/learned something worthwhile from the extra years she's been alive. But that would apply just as much if you were both 31.

Hope this helps

[MrWookie47]

Good post, LFTV. Could you perhaps expand your thoughts on the biological clock thing?

As for the comments about the crazy ones, believe me, I'm always watching out for them. I've had way too many experiences with crazy girls to know to always be cautious, especially if they say anything about not having been dating in a while. I've been pleasantly surprised with how sane this girl appears to be, however. Things can change in a flash, but so far so good.

[jba]

My last gf was an older woman (23-34) who was pretty terrible in the sack. small sample size I guess. she was also really really boring.

She was telling me a story one day, something really boring about her in a grocery store when she was a little kid and mentioned something like "and of course this was before they had bar codes", and I was like, wow, you're old. And you're terrible in the sack. So I said listen lady it's the 21st century, bar codes are as standard as BJ's so get to work or I'm out of here. The only time she ever gave me head is the first time I broke up with her and she was trying to talk me out of it. So I'm sort of a dick too.

[Blarg]

This was a very funny story.

[LearnedfromTV]

[ QUOTE ]
Good post, LFTV. Could you perhaps expand your thoughts on the biological clock thing?


[/ QUOTE ]

Pretend you are a thirty-year old woman who wants to have a family (i.e. two or three kids) "someday." You aren't really aching to have them NOW because -

There's a lot of fun stuff that is easier to do when you don't have kids (go out, travel, etc.)

You have a boyfriend/fiancee-to-be who you'd like to spend a few years with alone before you have kids (and he'd like that too).

You have a career that would go much more smoothly if you worked your ass off for ten years, and then had kids.

But doing all this means you don't start having kids until you're 40. Not impossible, but not ideal either, a lot of things can go wrong if you wait too long, plus you'll be like 65 by the time the last one leaves the house, etc.

A lot of single late 20's/early 30's career women face this kind of issue. And if you're the guy who's 24 and in a perfect world would wait ten years to have kids, well, something has to give. There's no perfect solution, it just is what it is.