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  #21  
Old 12-20-2005, 04:10 PM
Cry Me A River Cry Me A River is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 121
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

Grow some testicles and stop worrying about what your parents think! Geez, I'm not much older than you and I talk to my parents maybe once a month, max. And on the phone at that - If I don't want to talk to them about something, I don't. If you were 18 and living at home, okay this post might make sense but you're 28 freak'n years old. Grow up already!

That being said, Gamblers Anonymous, dude, seriously! Do you really think what you are doing is a sustainable lifestyle? Are you trying to prove your parents right, or are just just rebelling with no purpose? Again, if you were still a teenager, fine, whatever, but you're a grown [censored] man! Stop behaving like a spoiled [censored] child!
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  #22  
Old 12-20-2005, 04:19 PM
XChamp XChamp is offline
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Posts: 164
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

Some of the responses on here are horrible. What is wrong with simple respect for your father and mother?!
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  #23  
Old 12-20-2005, 04:57 PM
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Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]
Some of the responses on here are horrible. What is wrong with simple respect for your father and mother?!

[/ QUOTE ]

I was'nt expecting a lot of the posters to understand my situation. Its a reflection of the difference in traditions. Only people who come from a similar background will understand. I agree with living your own life. But your family vales and traditions should mean a thing or two. I made this post to let it out and people sure are giving it to me. Please keep them coming.
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  #24  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:02 PM
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Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I know I can make money at poker but I need a lot of discipline.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait...within a year you went from first deposit to NL 2K? After putting in 15 hours per week!?

LOLOL.

You are not fit for this lifestyle. You may be intelligent, but you have absolutely zero discipline whatsoever. You are greedy. Looks like your parents may have been right.

Now you don't know what to do b/c you cannot fathom telling your 'rents that you lost money playing poker. And on top of that, you are bad at poker.

Tough situation. I'd say get a job in the "real world" with the rest of the dreamers. Not trying to be rude, just honest. You have no effing clue what you are doing.

Good luck.

[/ QUOTE ]

PM me If you want to see my PT stats. I agree with only one thing you said in this post. I lack discipline and money management skills.
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  #25  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:31 PM
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Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
I know I can make money at poker but I need a lot of discipline.

[/ QUOTE ]

Wait...within a year you went from first deposit to NL 2K? After putting in 15 hours per week!?

LOLOL.

You are not fit for this lifestyle. You may be intelligent, but you have absolutely zero discipline whatsoever. You are greedy. Looks like your parents may have been right.

Now you don't know what to do b/c you cannot fathom telling your 'rents that you lost money playing poker. And on top of that, you are bad at poker.

Tough situation. I'd say get a job in the "real world" with the rest of the dreamers. Not trying to be rude, just honest. You have no effing clue what you are doing.

Good luck.

[/ QUOTE ]

PM me If you want to see my PT stats. I agree with only one thing you said in this post. I lack discipline and money management skills.

[/ QUOTE ]

I never said you lacked money management skills, but now that you mention it, yes. You do.

What will PMing me your PT stats show? That overall you are down this year? That you are a losing player? That you may or may not have went on a sick run of cards and were up 30 buy ins at the highest level? What is the point? By your admission, you've basically invested about 750 hours into poker this year (15x50). I simply think that this is not enough time/energy to devote before playing the highest stakes on your site.

You really probably have no idea if you are a "winning player". You may be a Mike Matusow type of cash game player. Great at collecting money, and even better at losing it.

I just hope (for your parents sake) that you were smart enough to put some of that 60K into savings/investments before you threw it all away.

Good luck.
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  #26  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:42 PM
Bluffoon Bluffoon is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 184
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Some of the responses on here are horrible. What is wrong with simple respect for your father and mother?!

[/ QUOTE ]

I was'nt expecting a lot of the posters to understand my situation. Its a reflection of the difference in traditions. Only people who come from a similar background will understand. I agree with living your own life. But your family vales and traditions should mean a thing or two. I made this post to let it out and people sure are giving it to me. Please keep them coming.

[/ QUOTE ]

Your family issues and poker have nothing to do with each other and blaming poker losses on outside issues is not taking responsibility fo the problem. Stop being a victim. Take responsibility for your lack of discipline and by all means deal with your family issues, but keep them separate.
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  #27  
Old 12-20-2005, 05:53 PM
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ]
Some of the responses on here are horrible. What is wrong with simple respect for your father and mother?!

[/ QUOTE ]

I was'nt expecting a lot of the posters to understand my situation. Its a reflection of the difference in traditions. Only people who come from a similar background will understand. I agree with living your own life. But your family vales and traditions should mean a thing or two. I made this post to let it out and people sure are giving it to me. Please keep them coming.

[/ QUOTE ]

Your family issues and poker have nothing to do with each other and blaming poker losses on outside issues is not taking responsibility fo the problem. Stop being a victim. Take responsibility for your lack of discipline and by all means deal with your family issues, but keep them separate.

[/ QUOTE ]

Maybe not directly, but it did affect my state of mind. I take full resposibility for the lack of discipline. All I am saying is I should have shown better judgement and not played when I was not in the right frame of mind. I should have seen it coming. And I shouldnt have played LIMIT poker. Obviously, I sucked at LIMIT poker and it killed my confidence and my NL game.

Few resolutions:
1. No more playing the limit [censored].
2. Get back to where my game was before september.
3. Learn to deal with other issues in my life in a way that it does not affect my game.
4. Show better judgement and set stop losses.
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  #28  
Old 12-20-2005, 06:02 PM
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Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

A competentent psychologist would say you need to "resolve your cognitive dissonance."

It is the academic way of saying what most replyers are saying: you know what's going on. Deal with it or get out.
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  #29  
Old 12-20-2005, 06:13 PM
mythrilfox mythrilfox is offline
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Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 23
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

[ QUOTE ]

Playing poker is a form a gambling and gambling is taboo is most traditional families. And when I speak of any religious hindu family it just magnifies a whole lot.

[/ QUOTE ]

I just want to point out something here, though it's a bit of a tangent. Traditionally all of society's codes of moral conduct have come from something simply being harmful to an individual or to society as a whole. We don't kill not because killing is inherently wrong, but because society would collapse. Same with stealing. Same with lying. This is where most religious codes of conduct are derived from as well. I assume the taboo against gambling is predicated on the assumption that gambling is -EV, which it has been for years and years. In the case of poker and a disciplined player, it is clearly not. I see no reason to continue to adhere to a taboo if it is now meaningless. This is all a very complicated way of saying "poker is not gambling."

If your parents are at all reasonable and you prove to them that you are a winning player, they will understand this. If they don't, [censored] them. You're 28, man up and start living your own life. If they don't want to support you morally doing something that you know is best then they are [censored] parents, and you need to begin to deal with this fact.
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  #30  
Old 12-20-2005, 08:32 PM
4thstreetpete 4thstreetpete is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Toronto
Posts: 167
Default Re: My poker (loser) experience

Hey devdas I think I can somewhat sympathise with your situation. In my family gambling is pretty much frowned about but for a totally different reason. I have several extended family members with very huge gambling problems that pretty much devasted their lives.

One was very wealthy and ended up losing all his possesions including homes, cars, his boat etc. He also lost his supermodel wife after he lost everything (big surprise there). I have another uncle who amassed a huge debt and has basically pissed off everyone he knows and now has exhausted all resources. Everyone keeps giving him money but now everyone is fed up because he keeps going back and each time he is more in debt. He also refuses to get help.

There's also been instances of suicide, drug abuse and domestic violence so I've seen my fair share of the other side of gambling addiction and it's ugly. My family's view towards gambling is naturally skewed so I see no point in talking to my family about my poker habits as they will never even try to understand. I have no need or desire to otherwise. I'm responsible for myself and I feel I have an excellent sense of money managemant and in control of my finances. I didn't always have this though and learned some hard lessons along the way but now I feel I have everything in total control and couldn't be happier.

I think the cultural differences makes it very difficult for others to understand. It's hard to judge a man until you walk a mile in his shoes, and it's so true.

I know you want to make your parents happy but if religion is not your thing then just make it very clear to them and try not to discuss it with them in the future. Actually this is a quality I admire in you quite a lot. I think it takes a lot to stand up for yourself when it comes to religion when your parents are raised one way. It's not easy but if your parents made you become someone that you weren't happy with then you might resent them later in life. Just make your position clear and let your parents know that. Try not to fight with them over this issue in the future, if they bring it up just ignore it and after a while hopefully they will leave you alone. You'll have to make it clear though.

As I see it your poker habits is a much bigger problem. You're not unique in building a huge bankroll and then losing it all, I'm sure many very good 2+2'ers have been in this situation, heck many of the top pro's in the industry have gone bust many times over. Either you get your act together or go get some help. You'll definately need to sit down and reevaluate yourself.

Once you get your act together, these feelings of guilt will be a lot easier to deal with. Sometimes a lot of these pressures that we face are pressures that we put on ourselves. You honor your family and want them to be happy with you, but we see ourselves as total failures because we don't live up to their expectations. After a while you'll see that a lot of the conflicts within us are self induced.
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