Why are poker players (and in particular these forums) so hostile?

[revots33]

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People who are here to learn get insulted constantly, and every little mistake new posters make is not just immediately pounced upon, but brought up again and again.

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Take a poker forum where everyone considers themselves an expert, add in the anonymity of the internet, and finally toss in a basic question from a newbie who's looking to learn, and you've got a recipe for sarcasm/ridicule/flame/etc.

I try to ignore the mean-spirited responses and pay attention to the worthwhile advice (and yes, even the sarcastic responses often have some good strategy advice mixed in).

Just like in regular life, I think we tend to notice the minority of idiots, more than we notice the majority of people who are actually trying to help by sharing their expertise and knowledge. A lot of people on this board do in fact go out of their way to help their fellow 2+2ers to learn to play better poker.

[steamboatin]

The irony of it is, oftentimes, while someone is flaming you, they let slip a really important piece of information they never would have disclosed otherwise.

Not just the one or two word flames but if someone that actualy knows what He/She is talking about decides to go on a rant and really let you have it over multiple paragraphs, there is gold in those rants.

Don't just dismiss a flame from an experienced poster, learn from it!

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Just like in regular life, I think we tend to notice the majority of idiots, more than we notice the minority of people who are actually trying to help by sharing their expertise and knowledge.

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FYP [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

EDIT: This is why we make money in poker.

[redbaronat]

Hi,

What you are seeing here is a form of paranoid behaviour. paranoid behaviour is all around us, and is in fact (in small doses) healthy (the have I got spinach in my teeth scenario), but it can also be destructive too (See London last week for example).

A good example is watching football. When you cheer your team on and try to rile or ridicule the opposition, then that is a form of paranoid behaviour. From a psychological viwepoint you are, in essence, trying to externalise all your bad feelings into the outside world, or the opposition, and make you feel good about yourself.

Now, consider your normal 2+2 poster. From what I can see, they are mainly post-pubertal young men that aren't fully developed yet in an emotional sense. If they were they wouldn't feel the need to indulge in such behaviour. OK, it makes you feel great to put one on someone, but at the end of the day it is, I feel, destructive.

The danger for the individual is that he or she can become quite successful in life with this sort of viewpoint and they don't make the next step of growth and become more rounded people. We all know someone who takes delight in annoying other people. How many close friends has that person got, that aren't themselves paranoid? And of course you can see this form of behaviour in religions, governments and most importantly in families.

I tend to think here, though, most of the behaviour here is more or less outporings of post-pubescent angst.

I feel that the thing to do is to recognise it (in yourself and in others) for what it is; a form of destructive behaviour. You can then feel sorry for the person who is doing it and simply refuse to indulge in it yourself.

Or you can get paranoid about it yourself and wonder why they are getting at you. In fact, just how paranoid am I commenting upon this??

You see, it's all just ridiculous!

Best regards,

Red

[Dave H.]

Personally, I dismiss anyone's flaming as utter drivel. I have no use for those individuals and simply move on to the next post. I believe that, for the most part, folks on this forum are genuinely trying to learn and/or help others learn. There will always be idiot trolls and I have been flamed by them; however, I am willing to put up with a few idiots in return for the fabulous education the majority of posters have given me. As I learn more, I hope to contribute more and repay at least some of what I have been given.

I hope I never consider flaming someone as a contribution!

[flair1239]

It's just the way it is.

Many of the posters on the strategy forums are between 18-25. This age group is not noted for it's modesty.

Typically young people particularly those who are (or think they are) very good at something get a slightly overinflated sense of their own self worth.

Add to that poker is a individual game and attracts those people who enjoy facing challenges alone, and you are going to have some big egos. When you get a bunch of people with big egos debating about a subject that they all feel they have a certain level of expertise in, well sometimes the sparks will fly.

That said, it seems you are taking some comments in your threads personally. Keep posting, keep an open mind, and eventually some of this will subside. That said realise, that just because somebody is an [censored], does not mean that they don't have something to teach you. You don't have to like these people, you are here to learn. Post your hands/responses, take your lumps, read other peoples advice objectively.

[IlliniRyRy]

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I haven't been posting that long, but I lurked for quite a while before I decided to get an account.

The overwhelming sense I get from these boards is hostility. Strategy posts are riddled with people calling each other names, assuming that anyone who has a different analysis is a moron fish, and it seems impossible for 90% of the posters on here to disagree without being disagreeable. There is virtually no respect for any poster save for a few of the big shots, and those people get so much respect it borders on fanaticism.

People who are here to learn get insulted constantly, and every little mistake new posters make is not just immediately pounced upon, but brought up again and again. People actually look back through other poster's posts just to find things to ridicule them with here. This seems nuts to me. There is absolutely no sense of poker community, save for a few posters.

Non-strategy related posts tend to be flame fests where everyone competes to be the cleverest, and I have rarely seen a message board where so many people seem to hate one another. The OOT forum is just embarrassing, politics is similar, and WPT is dreadful.

I'm a normal guy, mid 20s, with a normal job and a normal life. I'm happy and well-adjusted, and don't feel the need to ridicule people on a message board incessantly. Am I that much of an anomaly? Because I often feel like the vast majority of the posters on here (and poker players in general) could use some time on the psychiatist's couch ... so very angry.

~ Tilts

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Because poker makes you a bitter, angry recluse. Grrrrrrrrr.

[steamboatin]

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Personally, I dismiss anyone's flaming as utter drivel.

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You are missing out on some valuable information. I can't count how many times in the past that a flamer, while trying to show how stupid I was, has explained a very important poker concept or strategy.

Most flame replies have little value but to totally dismiss them all is a mistake.

I don't consider flames as a contribution but I glady accept any valuable information they may contain.

Just because someone is an ASS, doesn't auotmatically mean they aren't a good player.

[Dave H.]

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Quote:
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Personally, I dismiss anyone's flaming as utter drivel.


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You are missing out on some valuable information. I can't count how many times in the past that a flamer, while trying to show how stupid I was, has explained a very important poker concept or strategy.

Most flame replies have little value but to totally dismiss them all is a mistake.


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Steamboatin, I should have clarified...it's the "flame" in the post that I consider drivel. I do agree that many posts with such "drivel" also contain usable information.

[Mayhap]

Time may change your perception. It may also thicken your skin.