how pissed off should i be?

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I am assuming these guys were _________. Dont want to sound racist but thats the only kind of people I have ever seen pull anything like that. Oh, and yes you should be pissed.

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Why? When I was reading this, I didn't assume that these guys were black. If you are going to stereotype, at least have the balls to come out and say it, instead of saying "Oh, well I'm not racist, but white people don't do this, only black people do"

If I were you, I would be pissed off. Not at your girlfriend(is that what you meant?) but at the two guys. What these guys did was disgusting, and if they continue to harass your girlfriend, consider legal action and/or beating their asses.

I'm assuming the blank was supposed to be "black".

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Why would you assume the blank means "black", you racist. I guess whatever ethnicity each poster slipped into that blank spot is the ethnicity that they hate the most?

FWIW, I thought the blank was for Samoans. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[highlife]

Sounds like your GF is lying, I doubt this happened exactly as she told you.

[IndieMatty]

Just scanning this thread. Where are you guys going out? Jesus.

OP should be very supportive to his gf, and do his best to make her feel comfortable in crowded areas from here on.

[schwza]

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I am kind of upset with her for not notifying a manager or at least punching/slapping them in the face.

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you're a moron. tell her you're there for her and you want to do anything you can to help. then punch/slap yourself in the face.

[Pyromaniac]

Okay, here's how I read it.

You are pissed/frustrated because something happened--and you couldn't do anything about it. It's a control issue.

Then, you're frustrated by another control issue--your perception that she didn't do "what she should have done" or "could have done" or "what you would have done"...

So. You need to stop blaming yourself for "not being there to protect her" or whatever--but more importantly, you need to stop blaming *her*. Don't be "pretty convinced that she did nothing wrong"--be absolutely certain of it. (And stop looking for something that she did wrong, anyway.)

Your only role here is to be supportive to her. As another poster said, let her take control of the situation. *your* control issues need to take a back seat. This includes not criticizing her or doing a "what could she have done better" or a "what should she do next time" line on things. You're not her parent--don't patronize her. Even if you think you're trying to be helpful, you're not and you'll only make things worse. "What do I do to protect myself" is a good question, but you are not the person to answer it.

As for the question of "justice", I tend to believe in karmic outcomes for these things--which is to say that if these dudes do this sort of thing out of habit, it *will* catch up with them. Whether or not that involves some action on your girlfriend's part is up to her, though--not you.

-my 2 P.

[Dominic]

how pissed off should YOU be?

Wow, that has to be the most insensitive, narcisistic, unaware comment I've hear in a long time. Your girlfriend has a scary experience in a bar with two douchebags, she comes to you for comfort, and you want to know if you should be mad at her because she didn't "fight it off" the way you think she should have?

You're "pretty sure" she did nothing wrong because she didn't dress like she was asking for it?

Wow, this is like blaming the victim of a rape for how she dressed.

Break up with her. You're too immature and too big of a dick to have a girlfriend.

Seriously.

[Jordan]

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Wow, that has to be the most insensitive, narcisistic, unaware comment I've hear in a long time. Your girlfriend has a scary experience in a bar with two douchebags, she comes to you for comfort, and you want to know if you should be mad at her because she didn't "fight it off" the way you think she should have?

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I've clarified before... I am not pissed off at my girlfriend. Read my reply to El D.

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You're "pretty sure" she did nothing wrong because she didn't dress like she was asking for it?

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I'm pretty sure she did nothing wrong because I believe she did nothing wrong. I included the description of what she was wearing because she included it when she told me the story. I didn't think it was terribly important, but included it in case it mattered to any of you.

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Wow, this is like blaming the victim of a rape for how she dressed.

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You're making a big assumption here. I didn't intend to imply this at all.

[Jordan]

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Okay, here's how I read it.

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good read. you pretty much nailed it.

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As for the question of "justice", I tend to believe in karmic outcomes for these things--which is to say that if these dudes do this sort of thing out of habit, it *will* catch up with them.

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I sure hope so.

[Spladle Master]

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even if i think there's a chance she could/should have taken more prevenative measures, i am certainly way more pissed off at the assholes than her. i'm doing my best to comfort her and convince her that it's not her fault.

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Wow, I thought rory was off base w/ his responses in this thread, but now that you clarify that you are pissed off "way more" at the guys than you are pissed off at her, I realize rory is right.

I sure hope this chick sees the light and dumps your sorry ass.

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[Jordan]

wow, aren't you cool by quoting el diablo.

please... did you even read all of my responses?