Favorite post bad beat chatbox phrase-Nominations

[Los Feliz Slim]

ugh

[the_main]

Earlier today. Super donk at table gets this after sucking out on the guy for a fourth time.

"I've never laughed so hard getting my ass handed to me. NH"

I was laughing too, it was great.

[SmileyEH]

Dealer: SmileyEH has a flush, Queen high
Dealer: Game #3442372813: SmileyEH wins pot ($108.30) with a flush, Queen high
johnbuggs: are u serious??????????
SmileyEH: SHIP IT
johnbuggs: **** is so rigged
johnbuggs: its scary
SmileyEH: jI KNOW
SmileyEH: 55/45 NEVER HAPPEN
SmileyEH: OMFG
SmileyEH: !!!
SmileyEH: 1111
SmileyEH: 1
SmileyEH: ONEDN OENEOENEPNE
johnbuggs: so scary
johnbuggs: this online poker
Dealer: Game #3442383312: milgage wins pot ($5.75)
johnbuggs: one can only wonder
johnbuggs: thats for sure
SmileyEH: where you guys get your money
johnbuggs: guy is betting 30 bucks
johnbuggs: hoping for a spade
johnbuggs: LMAOOOOOOOOO
SmileyEH: OR A T OR Q
SmileyEH: ROFL ROFLFORLFOFL
johnbuggs: a 10?
johnbuggs: what does a 10 do
johnbuggs: lmaooooooooooo
SmileyEH: YOU CANT READ
johnbuggs: gives u a pir of 10's?
johnbuggs: nice hand
johnbuggs: lol
johnbuggs: lolllllllll
SmileyEH: LOlOloLO
Dealer: milgage has two pair, Nines and Eights
Dealer: mavrick222 has two pair, Jacks and Eights
Dealer: Game #3442390720: mavrick222 wins pot ($6.70) with two pair, Jacks and Eights
SmileyEH: if you HAVAE 5 ARDS IN A ROW YOU GET A STRAIGHT
SmileyEH: LOLOLOL
johnbuggs: guy says ship it like what he did was good
johnbuggs: LMAOOOOOOOOOOO
johnbuggs: awesome hand
johnbuggs: thats all i can say
johnbuggs: did u learn that from watching the wpt?
johnbuggs: LOLLLLLLLLLLLl
SmileyEH: BUY IN FOR MORE
Dealer: Game #3442398952: mavrick222 wins pot ($4.30)
johnbuggs: buy in for more he says
SmileyEH: YOU MIGHT BE MORE COMFORATABLE AT .10/25 NL
johnbuggs: so he cant bet 30 dollars with one card to go
johnbuggs: LMAOOOOOOOO
SmileyEH: YOU KNOW IT
SmileyEH: FISH IFSIDFSIHDS
johnbuggs: scary part about this whole thing
johnbuggs: is ur serious
johnbuggs: LOL

this was my favorite... it was so classic i had to put it in my away message:

so i have AA and push all in 200$ into a 2$ pot, then the guy calls with JJ...naturally he turns the J giving him the winning full house. im upset, so i say..."i trapped you perfectly and still lost" he then says, "how you win me, i have full house." and i realized that i just lost 200$ in a thinking game...a game which requires great reasoning and mathematical skills, to a man who says 'how you win me.' i then proceeded to jam a fork in my ear.

[the_main]

[ QUOTE ]
this was my favorite... it was so classic i had to put it in my away message:

so i have AA and push all in 200$ into a 2$ pot, then the guy calls with JJ...naturally he turns the J giving him the winning full house. im upset, so i say..."i trapped you perfectly and still lost" he then says, "how you win me, i have full house." and i realized that i just lost 200$ in a thinking game...a game which requires great reasoning and mathematical skills, to a man who says 'how you win me.' i then proceeded to jam a fork in my ear.

[/ QUOTE ]

lol

ooo this was another good one...guy who pushes all in pf no matter what every hand...i get QQ and call...he has KJo and as the flop comes out (J 4 7) he says in the textbox BUST UR ASS!!! only to learn that his two jacks are beaten by my two queens. He leave the table to avoid further embarassment

theres so many...

"pot odds"

the hit and run

"SHIP IT!!"

"Fish"

guy with the screename "AA_POCKETAA_AA"

guy who slowplays and then complains of a bad beat

"i always lose with AA"

"Well if i hit i would've broke ur ass!"

guy who raises 10 7, when his 7 hits the river on a 10 A A J 7 board

Guy who misses his draw and calls the river anyway

MY LEAST FAVORITE --- "Dude, what a night i havent seen any pockets!" anyone who refers to pairs as 'pockets' should be put on a rocket and shot into the sun.

basically internet plays have no respect, common courtesy, or compassion for their fellow man. The losing e-poker players are the scum of the earth, the absolute most awful pathetic human beings you will ever meet. makes me feel great to take their money and makes me wanna kill someone when they take mine and call me a fish.

Just last night I was playing low limit Party full ring game and I was dealt TT. Several players see the flop in a raised pot and it comes AKQ all clubs. I have no clubs and there are like 4 or 5 opponents so I basically fold to 1 bet. Guy to my left raises, etc. He goes on to win the hand with AK for a flopped 2 pair.

I type in (jokingly): Nice suckout man.
I had you preflop. What a joke.

Him: HUH?

Me: I had TT preflop. Nice suckout jerk.

Him: I flopped two pair jackass! How is that a suckout!?

Me: TT>AK preflop. You got sooo lucky. U a joke of a playa.

Him: LOL R U serious?!

Me; What book does it say it's good to play hands when u dominated by a PP?

Him: What book does it say fold AK preflop!?!?

Me; U a joke.

Him: Read Sklansky

Me: Who is Skalsky? Sounds like a (epithet).

Him: Uhhh someone who knows how to play AK [censored]

Me; Sounds like a cable guy or something. U go get sklansky tell him I wanna play him heads up.

Him: Theory of Poker, SSHE...etc. Heard of em?

Me: I don't read. I just dominate poker.

lol. This went on and on and the whole time he really believed I was PO'd about his AK "sucking out" on my TT at a limit table. lol.

Pretty sure he paid me off later, don't quite remember for sure though.

My favorite almost got me banned from Stars:

"F***ing Mongoloid F***Tard, get a kleenex to clean up the drool on your keyboard, you down syndrome bitch"

works every time.

[jkkkk]

stroutr: BULLCHIT