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Old 12-15-2005, 03:56 AM
Slim Pickens Slim Pickens is offline
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Location: Las Vegas, NV
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Default [censored] rodent

So the whole thing start after stealing 48 closed wine bottles and a number of open ones from a UNLV function... the closed ones are safely squirreled away, but the open ones must be consumed. I pour myself a nice big glass of wine at home to celebrate the heist.

While sitting on the floor (because I moved my chair into my bedroom to create a distraction-free poker environment) the f'ing rabbit (link) comes hopping over and upsets the glass because she is a lush. While the house owner, who happens to be sitting on the couch, flips out about the mess, the f'ing rabbit is sucking the booze out of the carpet.

I decide to rent a carpet cleaner from the grocery store. On the one block of Tropicana between my house and the store, I get pulled over for having expired CA tags in Nevada. This is wonderful because the CA DMV cashed my check two months ago yet I still have not recieved the new tags, nor [according to the rare non-dick cop ("Got anything I should know about... pipes, guns..." "No sir" "Good" No further questions... because I don't like cops poking around my truck without probable cause, which refusing a search is not... and btw there is actually nothing illegal in there because I'm not a f'ing [censored] like apparently everyone who works for the CA DMV) who pulled me over] have they actually updated their database to show that they've taken my money. After waiting for 15 minutes with wine stains setting in my carpet at home, I get let go with a f'ing ticket and still have to go rent the carpet cleaner and clean my entire f'ing carpet while that ungreatful rodent cleans her f'ing ears in her cage, which is still really f'ing adorable.

Anyway, at least I had 48 bottles of wine to ease the pain.
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Old 12-15-2005, 04:05 AM
billymonk billymonk is offline
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Location: Mississauga, Ont
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Default Re: [censored] rodent

Rabbits are the worst ever. My girlfriend has one. In fact it's sitting right outside my room right now. I wish I could kill it but then she'd be sad and dealing with her crying would obviously be worse then dealing with the little cock-sucker.
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Old 12-15-2005, 04:11 AM
Slim Pickens Slim Pickens is offline
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Default Re: [censored] rodent

Yeah... the problem is that is so [censored] [censored] adorable when it's not drinking.
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Old 12-15-2005, 04:21 AM
billymonk billymonk is offline
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Default Re: [censored] rodent

My girlfriends is never adorable. Ever. I have seen cute bunnies. This one is not. If there was a human equivlant to this bunny, I'm sure it would look like the lead singer of Sum 41.

You should get help for your bunny though. Before the drinking becomes to much of a problem.
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