CATOSTROPHIC NEWS for POKER

The Associated Press


Las Vegas - It has been reported that a famous poker book has been banned by the U.S. Attorney Generals office. In a statement issued by spokesman Mark Glover, the famous poker book Hold'em Poker For Advanced Players (all editions) is list as subversive and dangerous and should not be read by anyone. This has only recently been brought to the Attorney General's attention, said Glover, but he immediately issued the ban saying - and I quote - " Anyone who follows the advice in this book is attempting Suicide. And this office of the U.S. Goverment cannot permit this to happen."


Mr. Glover also added that all copies of the book will be confiscated immediately and publicly burned by being thrown into the famous volcano located in front of the Mirage Casino, to take place next Sunday at Noon. "This unprecedented action must be taken in order to protect the harm this book has and will continue to have on all Poker Players everywere" said Mr. Glover.


It is reported by some well connected poker players that the authors of the banned book, David Sklansky and Mason Mulmuth, are stunned but will fight back. At this moment there are rumors that both are barricaded in the 2+2 publishing house and are said to be heavily armed.


In other stunning developments, poker play in most casinos along the famous strip in Las Vegas is said to be in utter chaos. Some playes are shocked, some are openly weeping, many are in dispair. With no guidelines and every strategy in question it is reported that tourist are beating up on formely unbeatable pros. A grumpy player know as quad nines was seen leaving the famous Belliggio Casino with a wheelbarrow full of money. The famous poker player and 2+2 confident, Ray Zee, is said to have rented a Red Jaguar and is reportely driving at 135 mph toward Lake Mead. For what purpose and to what outcome is, as yet, unkown.


One thing for sure is known - Poker Play will never be the same. More news is certain to come and the latest developments will be reported live.

OH $HIT! DO YOU HAVE A LINK TO THIS STORY SO WE CAN CONFIRM? IF THIS IS SO, THE WORLD HAS GONE MAD!


BENNIE G

Your story or Benny's response. Can't decide which is funnier.

The most suitable reply I can think of comes from "Club Paradise" -


David and Mason...man the barricades and bring up the airborne to reinforce the position. I shall be along shortly with the Nuclear Missles.


RB