Why am I so nitty?

[Pepsquad]

I'm at a loss. Is it possible you're in denial? I'm not trying to crack a joke, that's a sincere question. The only plausible explanations are fear of loss, or a deep rooted shame of gambling/risk-taking. How would you know for sure it's not a fear of financial loss? You say your anxiety grows regardless of if you're up or down but you can still have a fear of loss regardless (ie - if up, fear of losing what you've won/if down - fear of losing even more). Here's a question Alex. Does your anxiety grow the further away you get from break-even in a session (+ OR -)? In other words, at the 2 hour point does the anxiety become overwhelming even if you are dead-even for the session? I'm only asking because if you're anxiety grows the further you get from your starting BB's for a session, it's safe to say we can link your anxiety to money and fear of financial success/failure in some fashion. I don't know. Now that I think about it, that wouldn't really help either, I'm just thinking out loud. I hope you find the reasoning behind this.