Trip Report: SFB's House (NC/Long)

[The Yugoslavian]

Okay so on Sunday I moved into a house with friends of mine. We call it Thug Mansion. Anyway, Thug Mansion is literally a few blocks from Skipper's house in Orange. So, my first day after work (last night) I decide to 'drop in' completely unannounced to see how Skipper rolls early on a Monday evening (6pm). [img]/images/graemlins/cool.gif[/img]

Much to my chagrin he is in his robe all sleepy eyed and ready to turn into a pumpkin, [img]/images/graemlins/crazy.gif[/img]. Wtf?!?! I mean, I know the dude is really really really really old....but 6pm?! Guh.

As I walk in the door his two dogs completely maul me, especially Marley (seems like even the dogs in the H***man family are a bunch of weed tokin' rastafarians). They follow me to the refrigerator in the garage where I help myself to a gloriously cold Heineken. It's no Amsterdam Heineken though, [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img], but it will have to do.....*sigh*.

So a couple of minutes later The Boob comes out fully dressed in one of his (26512335213651235) prized STTFHUC I shirts and slacks or something. The dude didn't even play the event and he pimps his clothing like he f*ckin' won the thing....poser.

Anyway, I attempt to teach him how to covert his HHs in bisonbison's converter. Well, apparently converting hands with bisonbison's converter is rigged.....so we decided to play a $215 instead (with Marley slobbering all the f*ck over me as I attempt to tell Skipper the correct moves) 50/50 - him in the driver seat. Here's the actual poker content:

It's level 1, we have JJ in MP. We get to a T high flop two suited I believe. Anyway, there is some fishy bet and Skipperbob is convinced the guy has AT...no other possiblity. Well I'm thinkin' TT-AA but I can tell from his look that I better push this hand...and hell...I'm here to gambooooooooool right? So of course villian has TT and Skipperbob can't believe it since the only hand possible was AT. Guh.

We're down to 25 chips and start up another $215 - me in the driver's seat this time. Somehow on the first table we get the 25 chips back up over 1k....but the blinds hit us in all the wrong places and we're toast on level 6....get 5th or 6th place or something retarded. Party is rigged when playin' with The Boob, [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img].

Okay, so in the $215 where *I'm* makin' the plays, we can't seem to stop getting QQ and KK. Now, in ~2/3 of the $215s I've played lifetime I've busted holding QQ....so this doesn't necessarily seem like the greatest thing ever. Until we actually win the hands! [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img] Somehow SFB convinces me to fold AQs ITM (the table is really weirdly tight which made for a ridiculously long bubble since SFB won't 'Strassa' like I wanted to, [img]/images/graemlins/mad.gif[/img]) and we end up getting KK again or something and take the whole thing down. They ship over the $$ to us and we're WORLD CHAMPIONS!!!!one!!!!evelenone!!

Oh man, so Skipper has to figure out how much $$ to send to my account but can't do the math...to make matters worse he keeps trying to subtract $30 from the total for the Heinekens I'm drinkin'. Wtf?!?!?! Well, I know he's bluffing as we all know he has a HUGE soft spot for pinko/commie/[censored]/shitforbrain Yugoslavs, [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img].

I get my $285 and contemplate just quitting my job and drinking Heinekens all day at SFB's house with Marley humping my leg nonstop as I pwn $215s for over $100/hr one tabling. Then I realize that SFB would be there and the whole appeal goes down to slightly better than the noose I have packed away from my old apartment.

Interesting side note: SFB's 'other' son is there. He's definitely cool but not even on the same planet as Dr. Irie, [img]/images/graemlins/smirk.gif[/img]....he did somehow name the exact house I lived in when I told him the name of the street I just moved onto, [img]/images/graemlins/shocked.gif[/img].

Note to Irie - stay away from him on Thursday.....he'll end up taking half your practice, your house and that big screen TV and perfect chair you spend all of your time in, [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img].

The lovely Mrs. Skipperbob was lovely as always and appreciated all of the jokes I made about SFB....good times! [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

I left and proceeded to go get many more drinks with homiez from Thug Mansion (where I live now). I even interacted with real, live, breathing women!! [img]/images/graemlins/blush.gif[/img].....I think I like my new setup!

Final thought: 'dude....I should totally go by SFB's *every* Monday and pwn $215s while kicking Marley and drinking all of his Heinekens!!!'

Yugoslav