What are your favorite lines spoken at the table?

[RollaJ]

1-2 NL 6max on Empire.
1 limper to CO ($90) who makes it $9 to go...... Only BB ($75) calls and they see a flop of 4-7-Q rainbow
BB bets out 15, CO raises all in , BB calls and shows 4-7 which holds up and cracks CO KK.
BB says <font color="blue"> "Sorry, April 7th is my Birthday" </font>

[deathtoau]

6/12 at the Borgata a few nights ago.

Old man in the SB says "I cap blind"

Proceeds to bet and raise blind all the way to river before he finally looks at his cards. His runner runner straight with 59o beats the flopped set of aces and the turned two pair of the preflop raisers and he scoops a monster pot.

After his big win, he starts caliing out "12 blind" on every unraised preflop action. His action and luck on the river puts 2 other players on tilt and we started to get monster pots.

I love just love having ATMs at the table with me. In 4 hours I managed to win just 6 pots but still ended up ahead over 25BBs. [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img]

[Shoe]

"Whose the matador now??? whose the matador now???"

[Moozh]

I posted this in Small Stakes, but I think it's better here. This was at a Party 2/4 table. While the first part is funny, I think it's the last few lines that really make it golden.

A: nh'
B: tx
C: damn raisers
C: youd think this was a 4 8 table
D: you mean its not
C: lol
A: i hate pre flop raise
D: me too
B: that's all you see on 15/30
C: everyone raises and then check when they see the flop
C: and fold on the river
A: the only thing you can try that with is pocket aces
C: why give it away
A: yeah exactly
C: if you have won the hand why tell everyone
B: on the higher wage tables, you have no choice but to learn how to play with preflop raise...a lot of morons out there
A: this is as high as i will ever play
A: i lost 100 dollars in one had
A: hand ealier
B: i've lost more than that!!!
A: 170 on one hand

[shant]

[ QUOTE ]
$2-$6 spread limit game, i flop quad 5's after 7 players limp for $2, I check the flop, call a few bets, get one max raise in on the river heads up against this cute girl. she sees my hand and says
"You checked the flop with 4 5's? If I had that hand I would have bet and raised so much you never would have seen the river!"

[/ QUOTE ]

Seems like she would've got more money out of flopping quad 5's.

[Accident]

My home game group has this guy that uses the line "it's all good" as he calls my $20 raise. My trip to vegas is paid for by these guys. I just love them!!
Accident [img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]

[Accident]

[ QUOTE ]
I was at a private game, sitting next to a guy who seemed to be taking a really bad beating all night.

He turns to me "Man, I'm getting [censored] beat up here! I'm missin these flops, but I just can't lay it down pre. I mean, King two, Queen three, SUITED. You can't lay them down."

I could hardly keep a straight face.

[/ QUOTE ]

My practiced response is " I know! you just cant throw those away!" Say it often, say it with sincerity!! haha.
Accident [img]/images/graemlins/club.gif[/img]

[Grisgra]

[ QUOTE ]
2-4 Foxwoods game, very loose passive, sitting next to guy I had been talking to for a while and he clearly thinks he is the best player in the game. He open raises UTG gets called in about 27 places (like every raise did in this game), at the end of the hand shows down 10-3o and his hand is way no good, when I asked why he played the hand he said "I was trying to steal the blinds"

[/ QUOTE ]

*wets himself*

[shant]

2/4 Party

A LAG I'm taking pots off of notices my location says Los Angeles. His does too.

He repeatedly gives me his address in LA so I can go to his house and we can fight. Now that is LAAAG.

[Xargque]

(This deserves a bump.)

Nickle/dime home game.

One of the many fish I play with folded A-3 after heavy betting on a King-high turn, only to see an Ace hit on the river which (surprisingly even to me) would've made her hand good. She says: "That's it, I'm never folding a hold 'em hand with an ace again!"

-X