What are your favorite lines spoken at the table?

[willie]

heard a great one saturday night at the 1-2 no limit game at seneca niagara

there is a rookie young kid (i'm young too, but he was defintely bad and should have been at the limit table where mistakes aren't as expensive)

1-2 nl 100 max buyin

big guy limps, buddy holly limps, bb checks

89Q rainbow flop

big stack bets 6, buddy holly raises to 30, bb calls, big stack raises all in, buddy holly calls, bb calls

brick turn

board pairs queens on the river.

showdown- buddy shows his aces, big stack shows JT for the flopped nuts

buddy starts coaching.

"you raised all in on Ten Jack man? who bets that much with just ten jack? blah blah blah"


yeah.....who raises all in with the flopped nuts....who does this stuff.

what an idiot.

[MicroBob]

The lighting in many B&M's bothers my eyes and I would PREFER to wear sunglasses.....but I usually don't because I just felt plain silly when I have done it before.

However, I might try shades again because the lights really do bother me.....and now I'm at a point where I would prefer people think of me as an idiot.

[nsj]

Just saw a "i can't believe you raised on a draw. moron" in the chat box as I sat at a low-limit LHE table on Stars...

As for the shades thing, everytime I play low-limit (3/6 or 5/10, usually) HE at the nearest casino to here, there are always a couple of generic young guys that sit at some point in the session.

They always have shades on, they always buy in for too little (like 100 at 5/10), and they're always broke within the hour.

[jedi]

[ QUOTE ]
This cant be real, Please tell me people arent this dumb

[/ QUOTE ]

Yes they are.

B&M 3/6 game.

Board is something like T927A. A little bit of action on the flop, but checked through the turn and river.

Player A has A6 for top pair
Player B has QJ for open ended straight draw on the flop.

Player B: "He RIVERED me!"
Me: quizzical look, looking at player A?
Player B: "He caught the ACE on the RIVER!"
Me: "Whatever."

[MicroBob]

neglected to mention that I'm not exactly a 'young' guy. i'm 34 and am fairly bald.
I can pass for younger if I'm wearing a backwards baseball-cap or something....but without the hat I probably look more like 37-ish.

If you're an idiot, generic young-guy wearing sunglasses at the table you just look like a wanna-be and a tool.
If you're a middle-aged dude like me wearing shades at the table you look WAY beyond tool and are probably approaching COMPLETE and TOTAL jack-ass.

But, since many people probably already consider me a total jack-ass I probably don't have anything to lose.

We'll see how my eyes feel the next time I play B&M (which I may try out during the holiday weekend as I expect the games to be pretty good).

[junkmail3]

I'll start a shades discussion so we can keep this thread interesting and fun.

[Manimal 42]

Online at a small stakes NL game.

I MP and raise pre-flop and get only one caller. Pretty slight betting until the river and the board shows Broadway with no flush possible. I've been doing all the betting so I fugure with a push we'll just split so I check and he raises all-in.

I just look, type "Idiot" in the chat box and call as I had him covered so we split.

He types back "get a life Manimal" and I explain how we could only have split and buy turning a $15 pot into a $55 dollar pot, the rake was the only winner.

The funny, at least for me was how he kept complaining and then the enitre table jumped on him in chat trying to explain it to him. He then tilted and went all-in the next three hands until another player took him.

Rule #5>> NEVER TRY TO TEACH A PIG TO SING. IT WASTES YOUR TIME AND ONLY ANNOYS THE PIG<< ;~)

[B Dids]

A- this is a thread in the B&M forum, your post concerns online.

B- this thread is not about "times you were a dick". It is about funny lines at the table. Nothing about your post was funny.

[Manimal 42]

[ QUOTE ]
A- this is a thread in the B&M forum, your post concerns online.

[/ QUOTE ]

A-Seems to me quite a few of these posts relate online stories. Didn't mean to mess up the protocol.

[ QUOTE ]
B- this thread is not about "times you were a dick". It is about funny lines at the table. Nothing about your post was funny.

[/ QUOTE ]

It was funny to me at the time I can see it was a "you had to be there" thang. Sorry! I'll fire my writting staff.

[B Dids]

My bigger point isn't that it wasn't funny, it's that being a dick at the table = -EV. And given how lousy poker players are, I can't hate him for a push there. People are stupid enough to fold on nuts boards. He was taking a chance that you were one of them.