Chilling vs. Dating - Page 3

The Stranger · #21 07-12-2005, 10:08 AM

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The Stranger - of course relationships can start like this. But do you want it to? In your post you never really mention being attracted to her or wanting to be anything more than friends. If you do, I'd do something pretty soon.

Josh W - Dump your gf and SII Paris Hilton's pooper.

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But with this one I see potential of someone who has the right mix of good woman, cool chick, and character that I think I want.

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She is a very attractive young lady

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Am I too subtle?

MoreWineII · #22 07-12-2005, 10:13 AM

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She has been over to my house twice to watch movies and sit in the hot tub.

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but I haven't kissed her or anything yet

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These two sentences do not belong in the same post, do you see why?

If you like each other and you're hanging out repeatedly, you're dating. For some reason you're not screwing though, or even making out, which is baffling.

She said she doesn't want a serious relationship. She never said she didn't want you to drag her back to bedroom like caveman.

Yeti · #23 07-12-2005, 10:34 AM

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Am I too subtle?

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Ok, I admit I skimread and didn't see the first bit you quoted. With regards to the latter, I have lots of attractive friends, none of who I want to date.

As others have said, you've been in the hot tub but tried nothing. This doesn't really strike me as behaviour of someone who really wants this chick. Get your skates on.

NoOuts · #24 07-12-2005, 10:42 AM

What does your sponsor think?
What does her sponsor think?

Bluffoon · #25 07-12-2005, 10:45 AM

I think that you of all people should know that dating this girl is a bad idea. Timing is everything. Maybe when she has been sober for a while and has her head screwed on straight. But not now. You know this. Dating her now would not be the best thing for either of you.

chaas4747 · #26 07-12-2005, 10:58 AM

Lot of dangers here. If you all do not work out will you both still feel comfortable being in the same room for meetings? If she would reuses would you be mad at her? Would you reuse to keep her close to you? Just a ton of signs that say wait this one out for a while and see what happens.

The Stranger · #27 07-12-2005, 08:49 PM

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What does your sponsor think?

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We absolutely insist on enjoying life. If I am completely honest and comfortable with whatever is going on, and neither of us is getting hurt, there is no problem.

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What does her sponsor think?

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Tom is good people.

The Stranger · #28 07-12-2005, 08:54 PM

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If you all do not work out will you both still feel comfortable being in the same room for meetings?

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Maybe, maybe not. There are thousands of meetings in the Los Angeles area though.

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If she would reuses would you be mad at her?

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No. About 90% of the AA people I used to hang out with outside the meetings are no longer sober. I'm not mad at them. I just pray for them.

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Would you reuse to keep her close to you?

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I believe that if I continue to think the way I'm thinking and to do the things I am doing today, I will never have to take a drink again.

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Just a ton of signs that say wait this one out for a while and see what happens.

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Absolutely. Sometimes the window of opportunity closes quickly though.

Rotating Rabbit · #29 07-12-2005, 10:03 PM

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If you were in a hot tub together and nothing happened , its way too late

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Homer · #30 07-12-2005, 10:13 PM

I wouldn't ask OOT for advice on something like this. Most of the responses you have received are silly. That being said, I'll offer my opinion.

Things are going well right now. The two of you seem to be on the same page. Don't worry too much about how the relationship is going to evolve. Just enjoy each others company as you have been thus far.

People are always looking to rigidly define relationships. I'm not sure why.