What are your favorite lines spoken at the table?

[jar]

4-8 at foxwoods on the first day of the WPT event. Two guys cap preflop, forcing everyone else out. They then check down acting a round ahead of the cards coming out. The second time the same two guys do this, I point out that it's not fair to the other players at the table, and if they do it again I'm going to call the floor. I get a bunch of crap for saying it for the next hour or so. The guy to my right, one of the players involved says "Yeah, it's a conspiracy, all 8 of us are working together against you." I point to my original rack of yellow, and the full stack of green chips in front of me, and say, "You'd think I wouldn't have so many of your chips then."

[jar]

I don't want to derail this thread with discussion, but I'm curious how others handle this situation. Discussion here.

[B Dids]

BUMP to the top.

[TheJunkyardGod]

I didnt take the time to go through all of these, but these are some of my personal favorite lines.

While sitting at a 2-4 table with my friend, he gets into a big pot with 2 callers. He's raising on all cards and ends up turning over nothing. When I asked him what the hell he was doing, he says to me "I was trying to bluff him"

Same friend would later go on to win a pot with 72o in early position. He rakes in the pot and says "and they say this is the worst hand ever!"

And the most popular line at the regular home game..."It worked on TV"

[htc1278]

NL Hold 'Em:

Player 1 raises 3XBB pre-flop and gets 1 caller.
AAJr flop. Player 1 bets the pot and Player 2 calls.
10 on the turn. Player 1 bets the pot again. Player 2 calls. 7 on the river and Player 1 goes all-in. Player 2 calls him. Player 1 yells before seing Player 2's cards, "How could you call me with that board? A possible full house--a possible straight and you call me? What's that?" Player 2 flips over his AJ.

[BigBaitsim (milo)]

Just now at a Party 3/6 table. I'm up 20 bets or so, and as a guy leaves the table he types in, "You know, you'd do a lot better if you didn't raise so much." His PFR: 0.00%

[jar]

5/10 kill at foxwoods. I check raise a flush draw on the flop for value and the off chance at a free card. Turn makes my flush, and I and another guy go a bunch of bets. I turn over the flush, he flips AQo for TPTK(he limped preflop). "Jesus (*#$&(* Christ" )(@*#% )(@*%)# check ( @)(%*() raising a )*&@#$%)& flush draw on the flop. <more swearing> You keep reading all the books you want."

[jmark]

Party $25 NL

Board is 582J8
player 1 flips over 92
player 2 has A5

player 1: rivered again
player 2: noooo you weren't "rivered agin"
player 1: yes i was
player 2: I had fives you had twos
player 1: When the river came did I win?
player 2: nope
player 1: ok then I was rivered. I know I was losing before the river, but then the river phuked me.

[KungFuSandwich]

This cant be real, Please tell me people arent this dumb

[TPL]

SirFWALGMan posted this comment from an online game in his Blog a few days ago, where a female player had been taunting the table, trying to get everyone on tilt. Right after winning some hands against her, he says:
[ QUOTE ]
I also got influenced by Snoop Dog on Howard Stern and asked if she wanted to be my Hoe, she would make more money than she is being my Bitch! Ha! She loved that one!

[/ QUOTE ]

I only hope I get to use that one myself, one day!

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