Dear bison... June 2005. - Page 26

bisonbison · #**251** 06-22-2005, 04:39 PM

Dear Panda,

You'll be fine, but it's definitely going to be the white bread side of fine. Frankly, most big schools will have enough diversity that you can find a group to chill out with, discuss philosophy and smoke marijuana.

Sure, these parties are more likely to degenerate into whining about banana republic-nazis and the squares that surround you than if you'd gone to, say, Berkeley, but hey, you picked the school.

bisonbison · #**252** 06-22-2005, 04:45 PM

Dear BonJovi,

There's nothing wrong with absenting yourself from a painful and awkward situation.

You'll have real anger that you're gonna want to express and you don't want or need to be a dick, but frankly, it's not gonna solve anything for her to hear about your anger. You broke up. You can be friends later, when your anger is legitimately gone.

I would ask a friend if you could stay with him/her for the duration. Then give your ex the number and tell her if she needs any help sorting things out you'll give her a hand.

bisonbison · #**253** 06-22-2005, 04:45 PM

Dear UO,

If you've got friends in town, deliver pizza. If you want to meet people, wait tables.

Supersetoy · #**254** 06-22-2005, 04:51 PM

Dear Bison,

My girlfriend just accepted a position that earns 1.5K more than my current position. This will probably equate to about $40 per biweekly paycheck more than I earn. With poker I still earn about 8-10K more than her per year.

She was previously earning 6K less than I was before she accepted this position. Why do I not feel 100% happy for her other than my jealousy? And why am I jealous over $40-$50 per paycheck (when I still make more than her overall?).

theTourne · #**255** 06-22-2005, 04:55 PM

Dear Bison,

Why do I nod my head when I agree with something, and shake it when I disagree? Is it a conditioned response? It feels so natural. Doing the reverse would be incredible difficult.

Thanks,
Tourne

bisonbison · #**256** 06-22-2005, 04:55 PM

Why do I not feel 100% happy for her other than my jealousy? And why am I jealous over $40-$50 per paycheck (when I still make more than her overall?).

Dear Setoy,

Um, jealousy pretty much covers it. Your sense of personal power was apparently based in part on your relatively higher earning power. Maybe you don't like your job much but at least you're earning more than her. Maybe you feel like the relationship is a little uneven, but at least you're earning more than her. Who knows?

You feel less than fine. Figure out why.

Supersetoy · #**257** 06-22-2005, 05:01 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Why do I not feel 100% happy for her other than my jealousy? And why am I jealous over $40-$50 per paycheck (when I still make more than her overall?).
Maybe you don't like your job much but at least you're earning more than her.

[/ QUOTE ]

Thank you Bison. I feel much better now.

bisonbison · #**258** 06-22-2005, 05:02 PM

Dear Tourne,

I don't know. It appears that the western style (nod yes shake no) is present in the vast majority of cultures. We're probably inclined to do it for some reason (physical sensation, psychosocial genetics, something) - able to ignore or countermand it with enough cultural influence, but more likely to just go along with it.

asofel · #**259** 06-22-2005, 05:12 PM

[ QUOTE ]
Dear Tourne,

I don't know. It appears that the western style (nod yes shake no) is present in the vast majority of cultures. We're probably inclined to do it for some reason (physical sensation, psychosocial genetics, something) - able to ignore or countermand it with enough cultural influence, but more likely to just go along with it.

[/ QUOTE ]

interesting that you refer to it as western style. There are some places in Eastern Europe where the reverse is true, correct? (nod=no, shake=yes)

bisonbison · #**260** 06-22-2005, 05:17 PM

I don't know. I referred to it as Western style cause I live in the west.