Fake Wedding - Advice Request - Page 2

dcasper70 · #11 10-12-2005, 11:40 AM

He's just pissed that he missed the bachelor party and want's to project that anger onto someone else.

Would you have done anything differently if :
A. this was their real wedding
B. you had known they were already married

This isn't all that uncommon, I've seen it happen a few times. Big friggin deal.

If you're that offended by it, do the couple a favor and don't associate with them.

astroglide · #12 10-12-2005, 12:01 PM

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you never took 5 minutes to go over the millions of good reasons these people may have had for doing what they did.

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cocked&locked · #13 10-12-2005, 12:44 PM

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He's just pissed that he missed the bachelor party and want's to project that anger onto someone else.

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This isn't correct. I became angry before I realized that it was the same day as the bachelor party. That was sort of a comical aside that acted as a further kick in the nuts. [img]/images/graemlins/laugh.gif[/img]

Look, I'm not going to defend the idiotic things that I was considering. I now realize they are petty and irrational thoughts. That's why I posted here - to make sure I wasn't doing anything stupid.

That said, I have never heard of this before and didn't realize it was all that common to deceive like this. I stick by my original assesment that it is a crummy thing to do - regardless of the situation. If you don't want people to know your personal business (ie whatever the reason is for the repeated wedding), then don't invite them.

Thanks to all of those that replied. I won't post anymore on this, and will revert to the "move on and worry about more important things" mindset that I asserted in my previous post.

Dominic · #14 10-12-2005, 12:49 PM

hmmmm.

I'm getting married in May....but my fiancee and I just bought a house and are considering getting married before the end of the year for tax purposes. Just a civil ceremony, no one there, not tell anyone.....and still have the big wedding in May.

The only reason we're considering this is strictly financial.

Anyone think this is wrong???

stinkypete · #15 10-12-2005, 12:54 PM

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you never took 5 minutes to go over the millions of good reasons these people may have had for doing what they did.

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whiskeytown · #16 10-12-2005, 12:59 PM

this happened to some friends of mine -

he was a resident assistant at a Christian college where he couldn't get married before the end of the year - meanwhile they can't have sex before marriage - so they had a civil union and held the wedding in the Summer and boy were her parents pissed.

There are sometimes stories behind that stuff that we don't know - I wouldn't get too hung up on it - maybe there was a pregnancy and she was Catholic or something.

One day of your life - I wouldn't sweat it....

RB

DrSavage · #17 10-12-2005, 01:03 PM

Getting married and having a wedding a lot later is very common practice. It's not like they had a second wedding for a single purpose of scamming more gifts out of you. You're way overreacting.

ddollevoet · #18 10-12-2005, 01:18 PM

Boo hoo. Let it go.

Rick Diesel · #19 10-12-2005, 01:24 PM

I have been to a few different receptions that occurred long after the actual marriage, usually due to money contraints. This is fairly common for people that do not have a "church ceremony". They typically just get married at the Justice of the Peace and then have a reception at some later point to celebrate.

However, that being said, all of the people that I have known have NOT had an actual wedding ceremony, and have been very up front and honest about the situation. Hiding the situation is wrong IMHO, however this is no reason for you to be upset.

Get over it.

Los Feliz Slim · #20 10-12-2005, 01:33 PM

My wife and I considered doing it this way, primarily because I think exchanging of vows (or whatever you want to call them) is about as personal as you can get. Insofar as getting married is an agreement and a promise, it's between me and my wife and nobody else. But, I'm an insane person and for some reason am absolutely nuts about privacy.

Anyway, we never would've kept the fact that the actual ceremony wasn't the "real" wedding from anyone. That's BS. If you're open and upfront with people about what's actually happening and why, they can decide what they think. By concealing the facts, it opens you up to accusations of dishonesty.