I tried it for the first time this past weekend...and failed.

[whiskeytown]

In a way, you're really lucky -

to have parents see you doing that and telling you to move up is the OPPOSITE of what I expected when I read this - I thought they'd be warning you it's a sin, etc, etc...

RB

[onegymrat]

Hi Jeff,

I've often wondered what is the difference between a poker enthusiast and a poster-type compulsive gambler? Put aside the fact that there may be dozens of threads on this subject already.

As another poster just pointed out, poker takes up A LOT of time. Win or lose, aren't we all compulsive gamblers also? What if you take the average compulsive gambler who's lost everything playing the horses or some dumb-ass dice game on the asian side at Commerce, and make him a long-term winning player? Does he still have a problem?

Does a gambling "problem" still exist if you are winning?

[Victor]

i have become everything my parents feared.

[A_C_Slater]

What you should have done was explain to them that the guy that won 1.4 million in that $10,000 buy in event or whatever it was probably spent about 10 years and 100 ten thousand dollar buy ins before he finally won first place money. So he's really only made $400,000 after ten years. Or $40,000 a year.

[Spaded]

Ever since i won $450 in blackjack my first time ever gambling (dad standing right behind me the whole time), my folks are convinced that i am just a lucky SOB. If i tell them i went to the casino and played, they always ask me what i play, even though i keep telling tham that i NEVER play -EV games like blackjack or slots and i ONLY play poker now. Yes, i still live at the parents house, but that'll be over VERY soon, hopefully.

Today i hit a small BB jackpot (3.3k) and the first thing my mother says after i fan the bills is "did you play blackjack or the machines?"... and then they BOTH asked "how much did you have to spend to win it?" Ten years from now if i am making a decent side income playing part time, my dad will still ask if i won it all playing blackjack. Maybe they think poker games include blackjack?

Your mother sounds like mine. Mine says: "That's not a lot of money to win for all the hours you sit at the computer."

Thanks, Mom.

I told her if I ever win a big televised tourney, far from thanking her, I'm going to tell Norman Chad and 10,000,000 people across America: My mother never believed in me. She's never supported me in anything I've ever done.

[Jeffage]

Compulsive gamblers can't resist betting on anything and everything and won quit until they own the casino or lose everything they brought. I sort of go by a different definition of gambling problem:

You've made a losing bet and it's your problem.

Nonetheless, many poker players (including some pros and winners, as well as marginal winners) are "addicted" to poker and the action it provides. They just don't lose money so there is no rock bottom for them. But many of them have priorities screwed up: They will put poker ahead of friends, families, their own personal health, career goals, other aspects of their life. The irony is that it is often this obsessiveness that cultivates an extremely good player, but many people who play all the time are not that good and would be better served putting their energies elsewhere.

Poker, as in life, is all about balance. Even if it is your sole source of income, keeping poker in perspective will preserve your relationships, life and health. Never EVER break a committment you have to a friend or family member for poker. Treat it like a business, not like you're on a permanent vacation (even if that's how it feels at times).

Jeff

[MaxPower]

I'm staring to really appreciate my parents. It sounds like some of you have parents that don't trust you very much. If you have proven to your parents that you are capable of making smart decisions, managing you money, and setting priorities, I can't see why they would have any problem with poker as a hobby.

If you are in your 20s or younger, I can understand some of this, but if you are in your 30s you should already have the kind of relationship with your parents where they respect your choices.

[Jeffage]

Do tell your parents that you regularly have days where you win and lose thousands of dollars, sometimes sitting in front of your cpu in your underwear? Or do you just tell them you go to AC once a month and play poker with no other details? Many parents would have no problem accepting the latter but would heap tons of crap down your throat when told of the former (even if you can prove you are consistently profitable). This is just my take.

If your parents are cool and trusting enough to not worry when you tell them every detail, they are definitely more accepting of certain things than most in my experience.

Jeff

[MaxPower]

[ QUOTE ]
Do tell your parents that you regularly have days where you win and lose thousands of dollars, sometimes sitting in front of your cpu in your underwear?

[/ QUOTE ]

How do you know so much about me [img]/images/graemlins/grin.gif[/img] ? I do wear clothes most of the time.

They know I play in live games and in AC and Vegas. They know I play online. I don't get into numbers with them. If they knew the exact numbers, I'm sure they would be suprised.

I don't think anyone who is not part of the "poker community" can understand how the game works, so I just don't talk numbers with any of those people whether they are family or friends. They are just "squares" and will never get it, so it is pretty pointless to try to explain it. In general, I just don't talk about poker with these people because they are just not interested in it. We have plenty of other topics to discuss.

As long as I am not neglecting my job, social life or health, I am sure that my friends and family would be OK with my poker playing even if they knew the exact numbers.

But then again, I am in my 30s and I have a long history of acting responsibly. I have never asked my parents for dime since the day I graduated college.