STOLEN!

[MikeNaked]

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When I was 11, my friends and I stole a van. They were 13 so they drove most of the time. We went to the mall in the city about 20 minutes away. We got that sucker up to 95! When it was my turn to drive, they put me in a quiet, residential neighborhood. I immediately plowed into a lamppost and a parked car. We ran like hell.

In the following weeks, guilt consumed me. I left my t-shirt in the car and had dreams that the police would publish a photo of it in the newspaper and I would be caught. I was so wracked with shame that I told my mom what happened. [img]/images/graemlins/frown.gif[/img]

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How did your mother respond?

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She got all weepy and laid on the guilt. How could she have possibly raised a son like me?

Then she told the police officer at my school and I gave a deposition. I had to spray poop outta kennels at the local humane society for 40 hours.