#31
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Re: What\'s the best one-liner you\'ve heard?
This one wasn't a joke.
A semi-regular limps (in various positions) in w/ KK for the third time I've seen in two days. He takes down the pot and I comment something like "very tricky, sneaking in with those pocket Kings." His reply, which was 100% serious, was "I never raise with Kings. I don't even like them. All it takes is one Ace on the board to beat them." |
#32
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Re: What\'s the best one-liner you\'ve heard?
I think I read this in Card Player a few years ago. An old geezer was being run over by a young kid who was bragging about his good play and the old man's lack of ability. Finally the old man looked at the kid and said " Twenty years I f#@&*d a buffalo, you may be my son"
maggie |
#33
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Urban Legend that I actually witnessed
hot, steaming eastern immigrant just got AA cracked for the second time in two rounds. a kindly gent next to him tried to sooth his temper by explaining "fluctuations..." The new english speaker burst out with "fluck you white boy, too!!"
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#34
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AND WE HAVE A WINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Post of the year. Surely the best one-liner.
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#35
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Oh, great.
I just spit coffee on my screen and keyboard at work. ThanX, now I have to clean that up. fluck you.
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#36
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Great Qoutes
I was playing some very low limit Blackjack in a casino in upstate New York last year and a friend of mine was in the last seat. There was a man in the first seat that had been making some terrible plays all night and he was down a bunch. He was grumbling about every little problem. My friend made a call that seemed ok at the time (I forget it now), and he ended up busting. The dealer didn't bust, and the man in the first seat lost with a bad hand (13 or 14 I think). He then started ot whine to the whole table about my friend and my friend looked at him, and said, "Hey buddy, you were losing long before I ever got here" which proceeded to shut the guy up. He left about two hands later.
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#37
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Re: Great Qoutes
i think i heard something like that in a movie.
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#38
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Re: What\'s the best one-liner you\'ve heard?
It's not exactly a one liner, but I thought it was pretty darn funny.
Someone raises, someone else calls. They see the flop heads up. It's 3 rags with 2 diamonds. Raiser bets, caller calls. As the turn card is about to be turned, he smacks the table and yells, "Diamond!". Sure enough, the turn is a diamond. Raiser now checks and caller checks. As the river is about to be turned over the caller smacks the table again and yells, "Another diamond!". It wasn't. He flashed the A [img]/forums/images/icons/diamond.gif[/img] as he folded to the river bet. |
#39
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Re: What\'s the best one-liner you\'ve heard?
I heard of this happening a few years ago at a home game (obviously). I wasn't there, so this is second hand.
Playing five card draw. After the draw, a player examines his hand, looks at his buddy across the table and says " I haven't had a hand this good since your little sister j**ked me off at the Christmas party". |
#40
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Re: What\'s the best one-liner you\'ve heard?
That's priceless. I'll have to add this to my repertoire.
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