confessions of a marginal (for now) poker player)

[goofball]

i feel like i can't get back on the path to being a winning player.

I started playing seriously last september. riding only my original cash in i moved from the .5/1 to 1/2 to 2/4 to 5/10 where i had trouble so i moved back othe 3/6 for a while. i tried moving up again and moved too quickkly through the 5/10 and 10/20's. I was at the 15/30s for a while but my bankroll was so low there as to be considered foolish. but it's so hard to move back down after moving up. dragging a 50 dollar pot isn't nearly as exciting after you get used to 300 dolalr pots. finally i prudently stepped back down to the 3/6 but i haven't been able to make mysefl win there. i think i'm making way too many loose call downs thinking that everyone at the 3/6 is bluffing all the time. I think i'm trying to steal too many pots thinking they're all weak, when in fact there are soo many calling stations. i think i'm too loose preflop limping with things like KTo, QTo, JTo, 56s and QJo from early position. I think i picked up a couple of bad habits at the 15/30 like getting cute with ym low pocket pairs against 3 overcards, and then wheni get played back at refusing to let go of them. I think my decisions to draw to straights/flushes have been fine since that is a matter of simple mathematics, but less and less i find myself calculating number of outs vs. pot size vs. bet size, thinking maybe taht i can just outplay these poor players at the 3/6.

So far i've really only had this this problem at the online limit holdem tables. in brick and mortar i can summon the discpline to wait for a good hand, or to fold my hand when i know i can't win. when i raise i usually have a very good reason and I feel confident at the real life poker table. THe same goes for the online no limit table. I've been working hard on my NL tourney game and have started reaping the rewards. every SnG i play i expect to cash, every multi i play i expect to last through the second hour at least. I know when i'm playing no limit that one serious fuckup will cost me all my chips, and that it simply won't do to limp with marginal hands. i've learned to be agressive in spots and to know when to release a hand. I dont' want to make the mistake that ends my tournament, so i don't make them. But as my no limit game gets sharp my limit game suffers. Somewhere deep in my subconscious i guess limit holdem is different. i know that serious mistakes only cost 2 bb instead of my whole stack. 2BB at a time on cards that can't win will absolutely cost me my whole stack and more in the long run, but hey, he could be bluffing. I have moments of lucidity to be sure at teh 3/6, but i'm always playing from behind, i see, to just be playing in substandard way.
i need to eliminate the weak limping hands from early and middle position
i need to not get stubborn with things like bottom pair or an underpair
i need to not thinik someone is playing at me every time they raise
i need to not ALWAYS suspect a raise when someone open raises my blind from the button or CO
i need to reexamine skankly's table of hand groups from holdem poker
i need to remember that at most 3/6 games i can wait until i have a hand, drag a big pot, and lather rise repeat
i need to not try to push 3/6 players off their hands
i need to eliminate all mistakes, or as many as possible just like in no limit
i need to carefully examine every hand in which i lose 3 or more big bets
i need to reread theory of poker
i need to imagine myself in a brick and mortar casino as i play online
i need to ignore myself when i want to make stupid things
i need to ignore that damn alien arm or alien finger, or something
I somehow need to relearn how to beat a limit I once beat with one hand tied behind my back. A limit that when i first moved back down seemed sooo easy but now just seems to be helping me hemmorage money.

my brick and mortar game feels sharp, my NL tourney game feels sharp, even my fledgeling 7stud game feels good, but the game that i started with, the game i've won by far the most money with, feels weak, dull.

I don't know what kinds of responses I expect. I needed to discuss in writing the hole's i've felt in my game, the almost feeling of inevitibality when i sit down at a 3/6 lately, the feeling of not remembering what i did to be so good before.

thanks for listening.