GOING ALL IN

HEY PIGS,


ANOTHER DISGUSTING TOURIST CAME TO LAS VEGAS AND GOT BEAT DOWN BY JOEYBITCH. WHY DO THESE VERMIN EVEN BOTHER TO PLAY IN MY GAME? EVERYDAY I SEE LOWLIFE SCUM THROW THEIR MONEY AWAY HOPELESSLY AT THE POKER TABLES. THEY DON'T EVEN HAVE A CHANCE AGAINST ME. THIS PARTICULAR TOURIST, LET'S CALL HIM ALLINBOY, HAD A PUTRID SMELL. SOMEONE ELSE AT THE TABLE SAID HE HADN'T SMELLED ANYTHING THAT BAD SINCE HE WAS IN ATLANTIC CITY. ANYWAY, ALLINBOY RAISES FIRST IN ON THE BUTTON. THE SMALL BLIND FOLDS. I'M IN THE BIG BLIND AND SAY "I DON'T ALLOW ATLANTIC CITY SLUGS TO STEAL MY BLINDS" AND THREE BET HIM WITH THREE TWO OF SPADES. HE CALLS. THE FLOP COMES ACE KING QUEEN WITH ONE SPADE. I BET AND HE RAISES WITH A BIG SMILE ON HIS UGLY FACE. I CALL. THE TURN IS THE SEVEN OF SPADES. I CHECK. HE RAISES. I CHECK RAISE AND WE GO TO WAR. HE RERAISES. I RERAISE. HE RERAISES. I RERAISE. HE RERAISES. I SAY "I KNOW WHAT THE RIVER CARD IS GOING TO BE. DO YOU?" AND RERAISE MY LAST EIGHT CHIPS AND GO ALL IN. HE GETS SCARED AND CALLS. THE RIVER COMES A 4 OF SPADES. I SMILE AND TURN OVER MY FLUSH. HE MUCKS JACK TEN OFFSUIT FACE UP. I ASK "WHY WOULD YOU PLAY GARBAGE LIKE THAT AGAINST ME?" HE GETS COMPLETELY PISSED OFF AND CHARGES ME. BEFORE I KNOW IT, HE'S TACKLED ME AND IS BEATING ME HALF SENSLESS. THEN HE TURNS ME OVER AND STRIPS ME NAKED IN FRONT OF EVERYONE IN THE POKER ROOM. NOBODY EVEN TRIED TO STOP HIM. THIS IS WHERE I NEED TO GET DELICATE AGAIN. HE MOUNTED ME AND PROCEEDED TO USE ME THE WAY PRISONERS USE EACH OTHER. EVERYBODY IN THE POKER ROOM JUST STARED AND LAUGHED AS IT WAS HAPPENING. WHEN IT WAS FINALLY OVER HE SMILED AND ASKED ME "WHO WAS ALL IN THAT TIME?" BUT I SMILED LAST WHEN I CASHED IN ALL HIS CHIPS. SEE YA AND WOULDN'T WANT TO BE YA, YOU FAT HUMPS.