Where is the rules about these situations?

[Jack Bando]

Playing a home tourney last night and we came up against a few rule problems. I am sure about the rulings, but no one at my home game believed me. Please also post where the rule is found (Robert's Rules 5.7 for example) because my word isn't good enough there.

1)Heads up who is the small blind and why? (I said button, due to playing on Stars and the back of Harrington's second book. They said the other guy is sb because the guy left of the button is always sb.)

2)Are side pots OPTIONAL with one all in and two still with chips besides the AI? The other non-AI guy said to me, "Do you want to make a side pot?" There is no chips in the side at the moment, so I said "let's wait till the flop." ( I might bet, and what he said is breaking ettiquite if not the rules) "NO YOU MUST DECIDE NOW!" "Fine, yes."

3)If I have 75 in the button, blinds at 100 & 200, everyone folds to me. I go all-in, SB calls, BB checks. The main pot is 225 and the side is 250. If i'm in the sb with 75 and the everyone folds to me, I'm all-in and can only win 75 from everyone still in, right? They said I can win the BB from everyone.... (So if I have one chis left of $1 and the blinds are $1000-$2000, they suggest waiting till I'm the blind, cause I could friggin go from $1 to $2000+. People who didn't know poker that well at the table were like, "That don't sound right...."

4)You have to turn your hand up with everyone but one person all-in right before the river? If I go all-in preflop and someone calls, we turn over the hands right? They were saying "it's optional..." and I said "Not in a tourney."

Thanks for reading and helping.