what just happened to me, AKo

[The Truth]

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PF threebet seems worthless to me, but whatever.
flop is horrible, you can barely peel... look at that.
river is an easy easy bet.

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PF 3-bet is standard. I think it is the best play in this situation. It lets you gain control of the hand. I like to play my strong hands quickly out of position. 3-betting gets you the most information, and gets more money in the pot when you are likely ahead.

That said.

The flop checkraise is likely to stunt the agression of the villain.

I don't think its the best play. You have odds to draw to the 2 overs. The board isn't pretty, but it is unlikely villain touched the board.

I check/call the flop; maybe bet/call.

I valuebet the river. If he has a pair, he is going to valuebet you. If he has a weak ace he'll check behind, but he'll call a bet.