The Official OOT Novel

[diebitter]

As he walked to the place to meet his adversaries, he remembered last night's date. It had gone okay, he felt.

But then Ace remembered, she had told him she had a blog!

Should Ace divert from the task at hand and go check it out?

Ace decided to put on the mp3 player - the 'punk apes' were on. These were the best band Ace'd ever heard, better than the Beatles, the Zep, the Floyd and the Rusty Onions even.

Ace loved their track 'MS Paint', and it soothed his troubled soul.

He checked out his new body in a shop window, and he saw it was absolutely perfect. He was a redhead, tall and willowy, skin like alabaster, firm-breasted, with legs that went on forever. Absolutely perfect.

"I wouldn't hit it", came an ape-like grunt from down the street.

"A 3 at best!", came another Trodglodyte snarl, animalistic and revolting.

Ace turned, and saw the filthy ungroomed subhuman forms fiddling with themselves in the gutter, and Ace smiled. Ace knew the type in some strange way, but couldn't place them.