Re: Open letter to myself: admitting my shame
If you want to cut your NL variance, tighten up preflop, make fewer big bluffs and big calls. Playing marginal hands, making moves, and calling potential huge bluffs are the aspects of the game that most demand perfect reads, so if you're not yet confident in your NL reads, limiting these plays will prove +EV.
I've noticed you making a lot of pot-sized bets. You may want to size 'em a little smaller. 2/3 pot prevents you from getting pot-stuck as much while still keeping the initiative, showing strength, and charging draws. Getting allin a lot is a dangerous way to play NL.
Also, consider this mantra: don't make bluff bets any bigger than is necessary to do the job.
Good luck, and don't give up on NL yet.
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