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#1
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Share your true funny stories
On New Year’s eve, I ran into one of the kids I knew at college and asked him what he was doing for a living these days. He said he was looking for work, and sort of looked down and out when he said it. When I asked him what was wrong, this is what he told me:
A couple weeks back, he had been working for a small investment firm, and was doing very well for himself. At his company Christmas party, he started talking to his boss about what they were going to put on the back of their own personal company T-shirt – apparently, the boss’ wife made T-shirts as a hobby and wanted to make one for each of the employees. Unfortunately, my friend was blackout drunk at this point, and when asked what he wanted on his T-shirt he said “BSD.” For those who don’t work in finance (myself included) a BSD is “big swinging dick,” or a big-shot in finance. His boss scoffed and said “there aren’t any big swinging dicks at our company,” being very p.c. My friend disagreed. He unzipped his pants and took out his dick for all to see. He even started whipping it around and around to complete the “swinging” portion of the acronym. He then took a tour, cock still in hand, around the room to make small talk. As I said, he was blackout drunk and didn’t remember any of this. The next day, he got a phone call from his friend telling him that he might catch some flack for the previous day’s events. My BSD friend was unfazed, until his managing director tapped him on the back and asked to “borrow” him for a minute. My friend was informed that there was allegations of a nature that would, if true, result in his brisk termination. The director gave him the option to resign that day and save himself the humiliation of being fired. About ten minutes later, my friend walked out the door sans-job, presumably with his formerly BSD tucked between his legs. Now share yours. |
#2
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Re: Share your true funny stories
One time this guy looked at me funny, so I stabbed him to death and ate his brain.
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#3
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
One time this guy looked at me funny, so I stabbed him to death and ate his brain. [/ QUOTE ] with apple juice? |
#4
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
Quote: One time this guy looked at me funny, so I stabbed him to death and ate his brain. with apple juice? [/ QUOTE ] And hard candy, and pixie sticks. |
#5
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
[ QUOTE ] Quote: One time this guy looked at me funny, so I stabbed him to death and ate his brain. with apple juice? [/ QUOTE ] And hard candy, and pixie sticks. [/ QUOTE ] But not graham crackers. That would be poor taste. |
#6
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Re: Share your true funny stories
graham crackers would be fine. it's milk that's gross.
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#7
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
On New Year’s eve, I ran into one of the kids I knew at college and asked him what he was doing for a living these days. He said he was looking for work, and sort of looked down and out when he said it. When I asked him what was wrong, this is what he told me: A couple weeks back, he had been working for a small investment firm, and was doing very well for himself. At his company Christmas party, he started talking to his boss about what they were going to put on the back of their own personal company T-shirt – apparently, the boss’ wife made T-shirts as a hobby and wanted to make one for each of the employees. Unfortunately, my friend was blackout drunk at this point, and when asked what he wanted on his T-shirt he said “BSD.” For those who don’t work in finance (myself included) a BSD is “big swinging dick,” or a big-shot in finance. His boss scoffed and said “there aren’t any big swinging dicks at our company,” being very p.c. My friend disagreed. He unzipped his pants and took out his dick for all to see. He even started whipping it around and around to complete the “swinging” portion of the acronym. He then took a tour, cock still in hand, around the room to make small talk. As I said, he was blackout drunk and didn’t remember any of this. The next day, he got a phone call from his friend telling him that he might catch some flack for the previous day’s events. My BSD friend was unfazed, until his managing director tapped him on the back and asked to “borrow” him for a minute. My friend was informed that there was allegations of a nature that would, if true, result in his brisk termination. The director gave him the option to resign that day and save himself the humiliation of being fired. About ten minutes later, my friend walked out the door sans-job, presumably with his formerly BSD tucked between his legs. Now share yours. [/ QUOTE ] WoW You win! |
#8
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Re: Share your true funny stories
You really should've waited a while for this one...game, set, match.
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#9
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
You really should've waited a while for this one...game, set, match. [/ QUOTE ] I thought it needed to be told a month ago. You can't wait a month to tell New Year's stories. |
#10
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Re: Share your true funny stories
[ QUOTE ]
Now share yours. [/ QUOTE ] I don't share my big swinging dick with other men. Thank you. |
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